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Thursday, September 20, 2018

I’m So Old That


I’m So Old That
I’m watching one of my favorite shows the other night, “Cash Cab” where unsuspecting* riders are quizzed for money on the way to their destination.  If they miss three questions they get kicked out of the cab.

I am struck by the questions and the people who get the answers correct.

A young couple hops on board, and the first question, supposedly an easy question is,

“What application reestablishes the freminide of your apple 6 iPhone to quantom flagulate the insecdiary portion of your validatium?”

I’m thinking “WTF!”

The young couple answers in unison,

“MQS72”

“THAT’s right for $25!...These next questions are for $50 and are a little bit harder.”

Harder…crap I wouldn’t stand a chance.

“What Vice President resigned his office after pleading ‘Nolo Contendre’ to tax evasion.”

I’m thinking, “Easy Peasy, Spiro Agnew.”

The contestants had no clue,

“Duh…no clue man…how about a street shout-out.”

A street shout-out allows the contestants to ask a pedestrian for help.

“This guy over here…YOU, I need some help.”

They read the question to another 30-year-old who responds

“Huh? Can I consult my Apple MQS72?...no…I don’t know either.”

I then realized I am not dumb, I am just old.  If they only asked old people questions I would do OK.

How old am I?

I am so old that I remember my mom talking about a street Lamplighter.

I am so old I remember rotary phones and people yelling on that phone if it was a long-distance call.

I am so old I remember new color TV’s where the only decent thing in color was the NBC peacock, everything else seemed a weird color just to show off your color TV, which btw crapped out and showed washed out color after about six months.

I am so old I remember milk in actual bottles left at your doorstep by an actual milkman, and no one ever stole the milk from that doorstep.

I am so old I remember screen doors that slammed shut multiple times as a spring whipped it closed because kids would not shut it quietly.

I am so old I remember changing babies with cloth diapers and lethal safety pins.

I am so old I remember steel desks with wooden tops with carved initials from the last eight students that had that seat…and the top had a hole to hold an ink well.

“NO! It did not have an ink well…How Friggin old do you think I am?"

*LOL! I originally had "unexpecting" but caught it before River could comment "you mean they aren't pregnant!"

For my SIL Judy, River is this blog's Mrs. Mund, she keeps me on my toes.

12 comments:

  1. Up until about two years ago, we still had a rotary phone, and when we had a regular landline, it still worked. In hurricane and flood conditions, it was the only phone that did work. Yes, my kids all learned to use it.

    You are so right about it being a matter of what questions they ask. If they’d keep them appropriate to the age group, i guess more people would win and that would get boring.

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  2. I don't remember lamplighters, nor the NBC peacock, since I grew up in Australia. I do remember milk in bottles, which didn't get stolen, but the money left out for the milk often was. I also remember cloth nappies and safety pins for babies, I used them myself for all my children, my oldest daughter used them for my grandchildren too. We had wooden desks in school which had holes for inkwells AND the inkwells too where we dipped our pens and wrote scratchily with nibs that were too old or bent and left plenty of blots on the pages. I remember never, ever getting to be ink monitor.

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  3. I must live in a different world 'cos we still have milkmen delivering milk bottles. Thumps air...YES!

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  4. I'm old too. So old I don't even want to know the answer to that $25 question. Lol

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  5. I was just talking about glass milk bottles on the front porch. I broke a few of those babies on those cold Chicago mornings when I accidentally hit them together!

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  6. I am so old, Nickes Bakery came around door to door selling bread.

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  7. I'm older than you so I knew all about the things you remember. My desk had a hole for ink wells. See, I am older.

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  8. Looks like the two of us are the same vintage. It's all good.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend, Joe. My bet to your wife. 😎

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  9. Golly, the first school desks I remember DID have ink wells.

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  10. ---I am so old I remember milk in actual bottles left at your doorstep by an actual milkman, and no one ever stole the milk from that doorstep.---

    Hi Cranky (Old?) Man, please tell me how I can comment on this blog by sending/showing you an equally amusing drawing, related to the above paragraph.

    If I could perhaps enclose it to an email message, thanks in advance for sending a message to: federico1931 at yahoo.com.ar. Greetings.-

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  11. No inkwells, but my second grade classroom had a cloakroom, creaky wooden floors, a transom over the door, and hissing radiators with nothing to keep us from sizzling our skin on them. And the janitor always had a canister of that powder to sprinkle on vomit, so he could come back later and sweep it up.

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  12. No milk bottle deliveries - for me it was beer deliveries to the house.

    I'm so old I remember a chimney sweep going through town and people would call him in if they needed their chimneys cleaned.

    I'm so old I was born at home.

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