I HATE WELLS FARGO BANK

 

I HATE WELLS FARGO BANK

There, I used the word HATE, so GOOGLE will probably not allow anyone to read this dangerous post, but Mrs. C is in Greece with her sister and a friend for “Girl’s week out” and I have no one else to rant to.

That she is in Greece is why I have an issue with WELLS FARGO BANK. 

This is the bank that has been in trouble for opening bull shit accounts to meet quotas or some such shenanigans. 

This is the bank that once made me give them a thumb print in order to deposit money into my own account (I still don’t understand or remember the reasoning).

This is the bank that charged me $2 every time I took cash out of a non- WELLS FARGO ATM.  I was not advised of this charge, and my statement had so many little $1 cash adjustments from my checking account to my savings account (Also don’t know why; some method to boost savings or something) that I overlooked the $2 charges for over a year.

So today I go to the bank to deposit money for our monthly expenses.  We do this every month.  I write a check from my account at another bank and Mrs. C deposits it into her account to pay bills.

Why don’t we just have a joint account?  No reason, we just don’t.

Anyway as Mrs. C is in Greece this month it was my job to make the deposit.  She had the check written plus some cash and a deposit slip all made out and clipped together.

“I know you hate this bank, but all you have to do is hand them the slip, the check and the cash.”

“HA!”

I go to the bank, and slide the check, cash, and slip to the cashier.  For some reason with this bank, I always feel like I am doing something illegal. 

They did not disappoint.

“Is this a joint account?”

“No, it is my wife’s account with a different name; she kept her last name just in case this marriage thing does not work out.”

“Well, we can’t accept this.”

“Ah, I am putting money in, not talking out.  If the check bounces you will just adjust her account, we can’t use the money until the check clears.”

“Oh, the check from another bank is not the problem, we can’t take the cash.”

“What?”

“We can’t take the cash unless you have a joint account.”

“What.”

“We can’t take the cash unless you have a joint account.”

“Um, you know that is incredibly stupid, don’t you?”

“Yes, we do, this is WELLS FARGO, we are incredibly stupid…your lucky we don’t ask for a thumb print.”

“So, can I deposit the cash in my WELLS FARGO account and write another check?”

“Yes.”

“Buy I don’t have a check with me.”

“We can make out a cashier’s check for you.”

“You know this is really stupid, don’t you?”

“Yes, this is WELLS FARGO BANK.”

After only 30 minutes the transaction was completed.  The cashier was very helpful.  It was not her fault that she works for WELLS FARGO BANK.

I hate WELLS FARGO BANK!

 

 

 

 

GOOGLE IS WATCHING

 

GOOGLE IS WATCHING

 

It has been a few months since my last post.  I used to post almost every day.  Every day for 13 years, almost 4000 posts.  Now some of my posts may have been political, clearly a forbitten subject today, especially if you favored the wrong politic.  Many of my early posts contained “bad” words.  I assume, that by virtue of having an opinion I offended some folks, but never did I receive an admonition from GOOGLE.

Until today.  Today, after not posting for three months I received a GOOGLE wrist slap.

WTF?

I was sent an email which advised the following:

Your post titled "HEADLINES 123111" has been put behind a warning for readers

Your post titled "HEADLINES 123111" was flagged to us for review. This post was put behind a warning for readers because it contains sensitive content; the post is visible at http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2012/01/headlines-123111.html. Your blog readers must acknowledge the warning before being able to read the post/blog.

GOOGLE has suddenly decided readers must be warned about one of my posts submitted 12 years ago.

I used to submit weekly a “Stupid Headlines” post.  I would scour the news for strangely worded headlines and then add a clever comment to the headline.  These “Stupid Headlines” posts were never all that well received, but they used to crack me up even if no one else seemed to find them humorous.

Anyway, what could I have said the it took GOOGLE 12 years to find that it was objectionable and needed a warning?

Apparently GOOGLE must have recently run all their blogs from the beginning of the world through a program with some kind of algorithms that catch offensive material.   I guess that is part of the AI (Artificial Intelligence) issue that is in the news and has smart people worried.

Of course I had to go back in time and read this GOOGLE warned post to see what I wrote that was so scary.

There was this:

Same-sex families pay thousands of dollars more in taxes- Gay community asserts the higher taxes are worth it to not have to live with the opposite sex.

It does mention sex, but is that offensive?  Do you need to be warned before reading? Maybe “WARNING, ONLY CRANKY OLD MEN WILL FIND THIS TO BE FUNNY”.  Anyway, this could not be it.

Maybe it was:

Man Dials 911, Lodges Complaint About Hookers – Claims he wasn’t screwed.

It does mention hookers and screwed, but…really?

Maybe it was this one:

Obesity linked to older adults' risk of falls- Researchers also find a link between obesity and overeating, obesity and stains on ties, obesity and large pant size and obesity and flatulence.

Can you no longer even mention fat people? IS that fat shaming? Can’t be, could it?

How about this one:

Egyptian Court Bans Military 'Virginity Tests' on Female Detainees – Egyptian Military no longer able to ask female detainees, “Do you know what a virgin is?”

Is “virgin” wrong? Is this demeaning to woman? I thought it was funny.

Then Mrs. C found the headline that proves that artificial intelligence can be dangerous:

Porn Film Condom Proposal Qualifies for Los Angeles Ballot, But City Objects – Four out of five doctors claim that condoms on porn films will have little effect in preventing venereal diseases, but may prevent little baby porn films.

I thought it was funny.  Instead of the actors required to use condoms I read it as putting condoms on the actual film which would prevent little baby porn films.

Once again, I thought this was funny.  Apparently, I was the only one that thought this headline play on words was funny, but clearly not offensive or perverted…until

Mrs. C figured,

“Perhaps just the term ‘little baby porn films’ was interpreted as BABY porn, not little baby films prevented by putting condoms on the actual film. (Stupid, but harmless…and yes once again I thought it was funny.)

So, there you have it. GOOGLE is out to save you from A Cranky Old Man’s very bad sense of humor.

You have been warned.

I assume I will receive another email based on the content of this post.

Sigh….

 

Not So Fob-u-lous

 

Not So Fob-u-lous

 

My 2018 Honda HR-V has a keyless start system.  As long as your key fob is with you, all you need to do is press the start button.  To enter the car, the door will unlock when you pull the handle, also as long as the key fob is with you. It is a very nice system.

Except.

What happens when the battery on the key fob runs out?

Today I tried to open the door, but it remained locked.  Pushing the unlock button did work, and the car did start, but I suspected the battery was running low.  I tested with the spare key fob, and everything was dead on that fob. 

I googled and found the key fob battery generally only will last 2-3 years. 

My battery was way overdue.

Not wanting to get stuck unable to enter or start my car due to a dead key fob battery, I ran to the internet again. 

It turns out the battery I need is the same as the one in my bathroom scale, so I figured I would just swap out batteries until I could buy a new one.

I consulted the internet on how to change the battery.  It seemed simple enough, pop open the key fob, pop out the battery, replace it and close-up the key fob.

Mrs. C was at work, so I decided to try the battery switch on the spare fob so if I case I screwed something up, she would not need to know. 

Mrs. C thinks I am incapable of simple fixes. 

She may be right.

I popped open the fob and popped out the battery.  When I did this, all the fob innards, buttons and such also popped out.  This was not good. I had no idea how to put all the pieces back together again.

Back to Mr. Google.

I found a tutorial on how to put a Honda key fob back together.

The tutorial started,

“Often people when changing the battery will not hold the fob together with their thumb…here…like so.  If they don’t do that, pieces will all fall out and you will have a mess!”

Why did the first tutorial on battery changing not specify that little piece of information?

With the help of this tutorial, and with much fumbling and cursing, I was able to put the backup fob back together with the bathroom scale battery, and everything worked as it should.

Now I need to purchase another battery for the main key fob.  I’ll know how to change it, but Mrs. C will not trust me to not screw it up.

Should I admit that I already screwed up on the backup key fob and was finally able to put it back together so I now know how to do it correctly, or should I just take it to the dealer and pay someone to do it for me?

It might seem like a waste of money to take it to the dealer, but I think I would prefer to not admit to screwing it up on my first attempt.

I may be incompetent, but I am not stupid!