"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
I generally post a Mrs. Cranky story
on Thursdays, but lately she gives me so much material I may have to do two
Mrs. Cranky posts a week.
We recently
discovered a cable channel that is very interesting. When nothing else is on, this is our go to
station. The station has stories of
women killing men 24/7. We call it the
“Women killing Men” station.
Last Saturday
I was in my basement cave watching golf and futsing around with my guitar. Mrs. Cranky was upstairs taking a nap. The
show she was watching before nodding off on her Saturday nap was “Wives with Knives.”
Suddenly Mrs.
C came downstairs and was pissed at me.
It seems she had a dream within a dream.
I was doing something in the closet that got her upset. She “woke up” and thought I was in the
bathroom. She started to complain to me
about what I had done in the closet when she woke up for real and realized I
was actually in the basement. Still she
was angry with me.
“I dreamed you were fooling with
stuff in my closet. You need to stay
away from my stuff in the closet!”
“Kare…it was a dream.”
“Well it seemed real, and then I
dreamed I woke up. I had a dream inside
a dream, it was weird and it was somehow your fault.”
“How many times do I have to tell you
I am not responsible for anything I do inside your dreams?”
“I know! Still it is hard to get out of my head. Even in my dreams you are a jerk!”
This Saturday while I was relaxing in my basement cave I got a text from Mrs. C who awoke from her Saturday
nap,
“Another
dream in a dream, you are killing me.”
I went upstairs.
I went upstairs.
“What now?”
“Once more I dreamed you were doing
stuff in my closet. I thought I woke up
and you were still being a jerk. Then I
woke up for real; it was another dream in a dream.”
“Again; I am not responsible for
anything I may do inside your dreams”
Here comes
the comment from Mrs. C that scares me and yet in some strange way endears her
to me.
“I wanted to text, 'I’m going to kill
you' but I thought that if anything does happen to you they would suspect me.”
I think she
needs to take her nap while watching “Say YES to the Dress.”
Dang, you watch a lot of TV! And I've never heard of those stations. I must have the economy cable package...just news and sports.
ReplyDeleteMaybe if she nodded off watching porn she'd text you.... ;)
LOL with the text, she was wise not to have anything that might incriminate her. I have had dreams where hubby has cheated on me and when I wake up am mad at him, LOL. Powerful things those dreams.
ReplyDeletebetty
You need to dump those channels above 999.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Joanne 100%! Do it NOW!!!
ReplyDeleteI think she needs to quit watching that show. Yikes. You've such an interesting household.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day and watch out for Mrs. C. ☺
DANGER, CRANKY ROBINSON!!! MRS. CRANKY SMITH IS OUT TO GET YOU. TIME TO FIND A NEW SPACE SHIP?
ReplyDeleteMy apologies to "Lost in Space" fans.
i'm laughing!! yes, better not to put that into a text as it'll come back to bite her someday!
ReplyDeleteLOL.. we love Mrs. Cranky.
ReplyDeleteShe's one of my favorite people!!
ReplyDeleteHi Crankyman,
ReplyDeleteMrs PM suffers from the same problem.
:o)
Cheers
PM
Actually you may have saved your life by putting this post out there. Now she doesn't dare do you in. Better than a text and we are witnesses. You might want to block some channels.
ReplyDeleteI'm with lowandslow. Ditch the knife channel and get some porn channel. Or cooking channel.
ReplyDeleteMy husband used to watch that stuff all the time. I called them his "How to Murder Your Wife" shows. Thank goodness for the wave of pickers and junkers and Alaska-living programs.
ReplyDeleteI've had a few weird dreams within dreams, they can be a little scary.
ReplyDeleteMost of my weird dreams are just dreams though, single level dreams, not scary, and I get them when I eat ice cream late at night.
I'm wondering what your wife is hiding in her closet.
There's a website called Wives with Knives, it's recipes.