THE CRANKY OLD MAN
Random thoughts and stuff from a cranky old man. Humor (maybe)and satire, mostly stuff from a confused head.
I intend for this blog to be non-political. If I offer a political statement, rebuttals are permitted, however this blog is not for the unsolicited political opinions of others and as such those comments will be deleted and not published.
NEW AND IMPROVED
This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!
Sunday, June 29, 2014
STUPID HEADLINES 062914
STUPID HEADLINES 062914
It is time once again for
If at first you don't succeed...
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my
stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.
One headline may be completely made
up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-do.'None of the above' may be a correct answer.
licked by Richard Simmons – Another reason to not sweat with the
Malaysia court rules that non-Muslims can't
say Allah – Cher
arrested after singing “All ah really want to do is baby be friends with you.”
Man sues British Airways after mistake
sends him to Grenada instead of Granada – Kinda just a Tomato/ Tomoto thing isn’t it?
GPS bullets are latest weapon for police - Everyone is a marksman when you have GPS bullets.
Hillary Clinton: 'You have to be a little bit crazy to
run for president'– I knew there was an age thing, and a
naturalized citizen thing, but I missed the Loony Tunes requirement.Can’t say I disagree however.
Westminster Kennel Club accepts new breed, a Cocker
Spaniel Poodle mix – No way, this
is too easy… when you clean up after this breed you scoop up Cocker-Poodle doo.
2 men throw out $1M ticket, sue New Jersey Lottery – Ah yeah, I’m pretty sure I threw away my winning
ticket too and it was New Jersey’s fault because…I don’t know but I should be
able to sue someone!
Hillary Clinton wants Anthony Weiner to keep quiet – Or at the very least, stop sexting her!
Tiger leaps onto boat, snatches man in swamp – This is no way to prepare for a golf tournament.
Hilarious road signs keep drivers in Alaska distracted – They have spotty cell service, so they have to
distract drivers somehow. Trump tower in Chicago floods after sprinkler test – And someone will be fired.
Last week’s fake was:
Tiger Woods shoots hole-in-one during
practice round – Right in the clown’s mouth…FREE GAME!!