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Sunday, June 22, 2014

STUPID HEADLINES 062214


STUPID HEADLINES 062214

It is time once again for


Who knew?
 


STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

 
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.

 
One headline may be completely made up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-do.  'None of the above' may be a correct answer.

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IRS says it cannot locate Lois Lerner emails prior to 2011 – This is a job for SUPERMAN!

Tree falls on million-dollar Toyota – No one was there to hear it, so did the owner really cry.

'Super bananas' may save millions of lives in Africa – “Look, up in the tree, it’s a bird, it’s a plane…”

Terry Richardson: I never had sex with Lindsay LohanAnd I thought it was just me.

NYC Spider-Man convicted of harassment – “Dude, clean up your web!”

One-ton shark headed to Texas coast – Nothing unusual about this except it was spotted in Kansas.

Million dollar Rhode Island mansion built on Public Park must go – I was always taught “Measure twice, dig foundation once.” Right Scott?

College student brags he makes $300 an hour as a male escort – He was actually given subway fare, but pro-rated it comes to $300 an hour.

Tiger Woods shoots hole-in-one during practice roundRight in the clown’s mouth…FREE GAME!!

CIA planned to make demon toy of bin Laden – Osama Bin-baalzebub Laden by Marx!  Batteries not included.

Pitcher Brad Mills Traded from Brewers to A's for Reported $1 – Do you want fries with that pitcher?

Goldman Sachs Trader sues over skimpy $8.25 million bonusTrader earned 7 billion for the firm by shorting risky derivatives products against firm’s own clients, the same products which sent the world into a massive recession, wants more money.  My advice to GS Trader?  STFU!!

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Last week’s fake was:

Mom arrested for meth lab after four year old dials 911 – “Mommy’s making a mess?...Oh meth!  We’ll be right over.”

And the winners are:

Sandee
I'm going for the mom arrested for meth lab after four year old dials 911.

Sandee winning is getting to be a habit, but still not passing the legendary Fishducky (Hope you are feeling better FD.)

Follow Sandee @ http://comedyplus.blogspot.com/ for surprise…great comedy!

BLissed-Out Grandma
I'm guessing the mommy meth lab, too. But if I saw such a headline, would I even be surprised?

You don’t need to be a Grandparent to enjoy Blissed-Out Grandma @ http://blissedoutgrandma.blogspot.com/

 

Visit and congratulate all the winners, and come back next week for more:

 

STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!!

13 comments:

  1. I will go with "Pitcher Brad Mills Traded from Brewers to A's for Reported $1" sounds to good to be true. I have not followed baseball since I was young.

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  2. I was gonna guess what Dan guessed, so to avoid multiple winners I will guess that "Tree falls on million-dollar Toyota", since surely such a Toyota cannot exist!

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  3. Sometimes all those little bitty marks on the tape measure can be confusing, Joe. At least now he has lots of work....he's in the construction AND demolition business. :)

    S

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  4. geez. have only heard a couple of these this week. gonna go w/ demon toy.

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  5. I don't know, but I liked your fries comment.

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  6. I'm going with the Tiger Woods one. I loved your clown comment.

    Have a fabulous day. :)

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  7. There's gotta be some kind of cheap shot about hole-in-one and Tiger's Wood...

    ...so I might as well take it.

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  8. I am going with Terry Richardson: I never had sex with Lindsay Lohan I don't think anyone is admitting to that anymore! :)

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  9. They all sound made up and fake to me this week. I'll go with the one-ton shark, for no particular reason.

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  10. Sex with Lindsay Lohan for me! Because I don't know who Terry Richardson is, but I imagine him as some kind of British political figure. Of course, this is coming from the woman who just learned earlier this year that England is an island...so I'm not holding my breath waiting for my name to be posted as a winner.

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  11. I'm so bad at this and over half of these I read on the news. But please tell me the CIA ain't making a toy of Bin Laden? Like we don't have enough problems with Arabs?

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  12. A big oak fell in my yard last week. There can't be two of those.....

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  13. I'll say the demon toy is fake.

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