NEW AND IMPROVED

This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Thursday, June 26, 2014

REMOTELY IN THE DARK


REMOTELY IN THE DARK

Mrs. C and I spend a lot of time in bed. 

Oh please, get real, I’m an old man.  We haven’t done that since last Tuesday.

We spend a lot of time in bed watching TV.  I love TV.  I love all the shows.  We have “On Demand” so we never miss any shows.  We have movies and shows on DVD.  We even still have a VCR player for some old stuff.  We have pay per view movies.  All of this is in high def., blue ray, stereo sound, and in glorious living color.  We watch with computers on our laps, cell phones at the ready and occasionally a good book on a nook.  This day and age, I think most people have all this great technology.  I love it, but of course there is one thing that makes me cranky.

Why won’t my remote control light up at night?

When the lights go out, I cannot read the numbers or controls on the remote.  This occasionally starts an argument in the Cranky home.

“Would you put on “Housewives of New Jersey?”

“What channel?”

“44”

“Shit!”

“What’s wrong?”

“I can’t find the right channel button.  I hit 77.”

“Just find the five, it has the little bump, then work from there.”

“There is no friggin bump.”

“Yes there is.  Damn, if you were blind you couldn’t find the knob on a door.”

“There is no flipping bump on any button.  Here, you find 44.”

“There…44…right next to the button with the bump.”

“How did you do that?”

“Just feel for the bump!”

“I feel no bump.  Whose idea is it to put a tiny bump on the 5 that only a trained braille reader can find?  It’s the 21st Century for Christmas sake; can’t they have a button that lights up all the remote buttons?”

“Where should they put the button that lights up the remote?”

“Anywhere!  What is the difference?”

“How would you find it in the dark?”

“I don’t know.  Maybe they could put a bump on it!”

“You’re a jerk!”

22 comments:

  1. Since I hate watching TV in bed and even in the dark I cannot relate in any way to this post! Except to laugh, that is!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like TV shows but I only watch them on DVR and never live. I like letting a series accumulate and then binging on it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. We have the same remote X 4-no bumps.

    ReplyDelete
  4. There are only two things I want to do in my bed and watch TV isn't one of them - fortunately neither of them require a light up remote either ...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sarah said it perfectly. No light up remote at our house either.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I gotta to see if my remote has a bump on the #5 button.
    If I don't come back, call search and resccue.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Our honkin' big 36" CRT TV that we have in our basement has (maybe "had") a remote that lit up. Sucks battery life though.
    Upstairs here, I have to turn on the lamp next to my bed if I'm doing anything remotely complicated. I think that was a pun.

    ReplyDelete
  8. haha.

    i finally added a gadget on my cell phone called 'assistive light'. if i press that, it turns my cell into a flashlight. guess you need one on your remote - that you can find.

    ReplyDelete
  9. How did I know this was going to end with "you're a jerk"? Bwahahahahahahahaha.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'd hate to be in bed with someone, anyone, and say just feel the bump, only to hear there is no bump. Check again--I'm positive there's a bump, even if it isn't attached to the remote.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Our remote has the bump but we don't have a TV in the bedroom. However, with my aging eyes, the numbers are becoming less and less distinct so pretty soon I'll be feeling for the five and fumbling around with a pained expression on my face. God it's nice to find someone else who likes TV as much as I do.

    By the way, we're off to the specialist Tourettes clinic with OB at Great Ormond Street Hospital in two weeks time and I'll be sure to let you know how it goes.

    ReplyDelete
  12. You have better technology than me. or I

    ReplyDelete
  13. What would you say if I told you I wore the bump off the F key. Actually, that bump is called a registration mark. And I wore if off the F.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know you to be a very classy lady Joanne, I am shocked to hear you say you wore it the F off!

      Delete
  14. I'm leaving here to go feel for the bump. Who knew.

    ReplyDelete
  15. After careful examination I found my remote does have a bump. but you've gotta have a magnifying glass to find it. As no magnifying glass was packed in the remote control box, I'd have to give the win to Cranky on a technicality. :)

    S

    ReplyDelete
  16. I like watching TV in bed, too. As a matter of fact, it's the best way to fall asleep within three minutes. My husband is in charge of the remote. He has it all memorized, knows it by heart. He doesn't need no stupid bump!

    ReplyDelete
  17. You must not be too old if your only problem is finding the numbers to push in the dark. Can you actually see the numbers with the light on? I have to grab my reading glasses to see.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-ecstasy-game.html

    ReplyDelete
  18. No TV in the bedroom here. The recliners work just fine for sleeping, and we always have the light of the TV's glow to see the remote.

    ReplyDelete
  19. No bedroom TVs in my home, but I do have the bump on the 5 on the remote. Get one of those tiny keychain torches and attach it to the remote somehow. On a cord of course so you can angle it to see the numbers. Do you and Mrs C sleep all day after watching TV, computers and nooks all night?

    ReplyDelete
  20. We have the same issue JoeH, you are not alone...I solved it by buying one of those fancy dancy programmable remotes that can control 6 different devices...and ALL the buttons light up!!! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  21. I solve this problem by sighing loudly, fumbling for the bedside lamp and turning it on, placing my thumb over the buttons I will use on the remote, and turning off the light again. It's worse when watching TV on a laptop in bed, it's so much harder to find the arrow keys for volume, mute etc.

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!