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Saturday, March 1, 2014

NEED A LIFT?


NEED A LIFT?
 
 A cranky opinion for

CRANKY OPINION SATURDAY

The following is the opinion of a cranky old man with absolutely no expertise on the subject opined.  Opposing views are welcome.  They are wrong, but welcome and please, no name calling and that means you, you big stupid head! 

 

One thing I have become an expert at from my obsession with reality TV is plastic surgery.  I think virtually every “Housewife” has fake tits.  Half have fake lips, and everyone on TV uses Botox.   Do these doctors have no shame?  Don’t they need to tell people that surgery will f*ck you up? 

Because it does.   

I’ll give you one face lift…women only.  If you are an actress and your living depends on your looks, then ok…one face lift.  One face lift can give an older actress a few more years of 12 million dollars a movie work, after that, I don’t think so…unless there is an opening for a “Catwoman” movie.

The lips thing really throws me for a loop.   In what galaxy do big fat blubbery lips look attractive?  Some of these ladies on the reality TV shows look like they could be in the old circus sideshows.

“Step right up and see the amazing “Duck Woman” are those lips, or is it a beak?  Come look, be shocked and watch the Duck Woman try and talk without sounding like Elmer Fudd.”

I know men claim they love the fake boob thing, but they are only attractive in still shots.  Ladies, when you move, and those big balloons do not have that “Titty Jiggle” nothing else moves.

What is up with forehead wrinkles?  Are they so bad?  They never bothered me, and eyebrows that do not move and faces that have no expression are a botoxastrophy. 

One thing I have noticed as I have aged is that older women look better and better to me.  I don’t get the plastic look.  I prefer a comfortable relaxed lived in look. 

How do I feel about men having plastic surgery? 

Bruce Jenner.

Need I say more?

 

The preceding was the opinion of a cranky old man, and not necessarily that of management…Mrs. Cranky.

I want to welcome an old friend back to the blog world.  She stepped out some time ago as her sight was failing badly.  After an operation she apparently now has enough limited sight to get back to the blogging world.  This is a talented and very funny lady, check Melynda out @ Life Happens http://pmmkpl.blogspot.com/ 

19 comments:

  1. the idea of surgery makes me shudder so i'll just live with my wrinkles and sags and lumps. :)

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  2. Ha! I so agree with you. I'm aging gracefully and the good, old fashioned way. No surgeries for me. Of course, this choice also has to do with the fact that our budget does not stretch for me to have any procedures done! Ha! But still. Even if we were wealthy, I don't think I'd have anything done. You know what's funny, though...people always comment to me, "You have ten children? You don't look old enough to have ten children!" and I always say, "Well, I've had some work done." Just for fun, I say that. You should see the looks I get.

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  3. You have, as usual, hit the nail on the head.

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  4. I'm far too much of a coward to have anything done - I'll just have to try and age disgracefully.

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  5. I think some people are obsessed with plastic surgery. I've earned all my sags and wrinkles. They are mine...all mine.

    Have a fabulous weekend. ☺

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  6. I shake my head when I see these people on TV. They look awful.

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  7. I don't understand how women can look at even as few as three or four faces like the one you've shown and still decide to go for it.. beyond the first time, as you wisely suggested. Some very beautiful young faces have sadly turned into clowns instead of becoming beautiful old faces.

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  8. I'll bet Wonder Woman never had surgery. Instead of going under the knife, women should spin around a few times.

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  9. It's sad to see what some people have made of themselves. There's no going back. Babra Wa'ters can't be too happy with her face of no return.

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  10. It would be nice to look like I did at twenty. Of course I twenty I had no idea how blessed I was. Couldn't see anything right about me then. Guess I should take my own advice and try to realize how blessed I am now.

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  11. How do I feel about men having plastic surgery?

    Bruce Jenner.

    Need I say more?


    Yes! Kenny Rogers.

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  12. I mourn the loss of Bruce Jenner. He was one handsome dude in his Olympic days. I even liked his trachea.

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  13. duck face? it's a porn thing man ....

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  14. oh dear heavens, that woman! So much surgery, so much wrong. Still, she thinks she is beautiful. I prefer a lived in face too. The only reason for plastic surgery is repair of disfigurement after an accident or if a child is born disfigured. Boobs? Replacement if wanted after cancer surgery, or reduction of larger breasts that may be causing back and neck problems is about all I can agree with on that front. I'll have to google Bruce Jenner, I've never heard of him.

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  15. Totally agree. I'm not impressed with fake anything. I can honestly say I see way beyond looks. And that goes for men, too. As it is now I don't even have to buy a Halloween mask. Just think of the money I save! :)

    S

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  16. Even if my life depended on it I will not say yes to surgery, let alone plastic surgery.

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  17. I welcome my wrinkles. They tell a story. I'd hate for someone to think my life had been easy and without humor.

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  18. I'm glad to hear not all men like fake boobs, but there's got to be a lot that do like them , or they wouldn't be paying for them!

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