IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPY
I have mentioned in several posts that Mrs. C refuses to get me breakfast in bed. It is a running joke with us.
I often enjoy a large breakfast of eggs, English muffins, sausage or bacon and a cup of coffee. I have to have my cup of coffee. Mrs. C will have a glass of orange juice and sometimes an Eggo waffle. Obviously her breakfast is a simple preparation; even the waffle. I can make that with my English muffin.
Typically I will tell Mrs. C in the morning,
“I think I would like a poached egg on an English muffin this morning. A little orange marmalade on the other half muffin would be nice…oh and two slices of the turkey bacon and coffee of course…with sugar and creamer. Thanks, I really appreciate it. Just put it all on a tray. A nice flower in a vase with it would be nice.”
“I don’t think so!”
“What? What kind of wife are you?”
“You married the wrong sister.” (Her sister Donna is known to wait on her man.)
“I’m pretty sure it was in our marriage vows. Love, honor, obey and bring up breakfast in bed every morning.”
“Fat chance, I only remember the love part, and that is starting to slip away.”
“Damn…well, as long as I’m getting my breakfast can I bring you anything?”
“Are you sure, it’s no trouble to bring you some juice and an Eggo waffle.”
“Well, if it will make you happy.”
“Oh it will, I just live to get you breakfast in the morning!” (Bold, Italics and underlined =sarcasm)
Damn, I not only don’t get breakfast in bed, but Mrs. C won’t even let me feel good about waiting on her.
I don’t get “Thank you that would be nice,”
I don’t hear “Why yes, thank you so much, aren’t you just the best husband ever.”
No way. I get, “If it will make you happy.”
And she calls me a jerk.