IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPY
I have
mentioned in several posts that Mrs. C refuses to get me breakfast in bed. It is a running joke with us.
I often enjoy
a large breakfast of eggs, English muffins, sausage or bacon and a cup of
coffee. I have to have my cup of coffee. Mrs. C will have a glass of orange juice and
sometimes an Eggo waffle. Obviously her
breakfast is a simple preparation; even the waffle. I can make that with my English
muffin.
Typically I
will tell Mrs. C in the morning,
“I think I would like a poached egg
on an English muffin this morning. A
little orange marmalade on the other half muffin would be nice…oh and two
slices of the turkey bacon and coffee of course…with sugar and creamer. Thanks, I really appreciate it. Just put it all on a tray. A nice flower in a vase with it would be
nice.”
“I don’t think so!”
“What? What kind of wife are you?”
“You married the wrong sister.”
(Her sister Donna is known to wait on her man.)
“I’m pretty sure it was in our
marriage vows. Love, honor, obey and
bring up breakfast in bed every morning.”
“Fat chance, I only remember the love
part, and that is starting to slip away.”
“Damn…well, as long as I’m getting my
breakfast can I bring you anything?”
“I’m OK.”
“Are you sure, it’s no trouble to
bring you some juice and an Eggo waffle.”
“Well, if it will make you happy.”
“Oh it will, I just
live to get you breakfast in the morning!” (Bold, Italics and underlined
=sarcasm)
Damn, I not
only don’t get breakfast in bed, but Mrs. C won’t even let me feel good about
waiting on her.
I don’t get “Thank you that would be nice,”
I don’t hear “Why
yes, thank you so much, aren’t you just the best husband ever.”
No way. I get, “If
it will make you happy.”
And she
calls me a jerk.
Maybe she has another reason to call you that. In our house, it's a term of endearment!!
ReplyDeleteI'm always the breakfast maker on this house and there's always a full English breakfast at least once a week, guess the control freak in me (which really is only kitchen related) doesn't believe anyone else will get it just right
ReplyDeleteI had breakfast in bed once but never again. Maybe I should have given her my golf trophy. I never got a wrestling one....
ReplyDeleteI am not a fan of breakfast in bed. It leaves crumbs in bed. I am pretty sure Mrs. C is thinking, "Thank you, that would be nice."
ReplyDeletePersonally, I think breakfast in bed is highly overrated. However, I really really do like to have a cup of tea brought to me. He gets one on school days when I'm up first and I get one on holidays and weekends when he's up first.
ReplyDeleteYour post reminded me that I have never once in all of these years made my hubby breakfast in bed. The thought really never came into my mind. I guess I should do this, but I don't want him thinking it is some sort of a truce though for an evening that started out perfect and ended up as a- well never mind it is a post I am working on.
ReplyDeletetoo cute.
ReplyDeleteIt's a given at our house - Jim makes breakfast. He tells me I'm the only person he knows that can screw up an egg.
ReplyDeleteMy Mrs. C. would make me breakfast in bed any time I asked but I don't really enjoy eating breakfast in bed. Instead, she spoils me in countless other ways. But I do love your "relationship" posts.
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh. Breakfast in bed is overrated. Jam and egg yolk on the sheets. Syrup on the pillow--may sound a little kinky but it just means more work for whoever does the laundry. Breakfast in bed is for hospitals.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't serve you breakfast in bed either. Oh wait...I mean I wouldn't serve hubby breakfast in bed. I'm thrilled he wouldn't like that anyway since our master is upstairs. By the way, hubby does all the cooking in our house and I do the cleanup. Works for us.
ReplyDeleteI love your marriage posts. They are always entertaining. :)
Women.
ReplyDeleteGo figure. :-)
Pearl
Nobody ever brings me anything. Maybe because I always say, "I'm fine thanks." So its my own damn fault.
ReplyDeleteThat was very funny.
Hmm. When hubby brings me a meal, I sometimes think "If it makes you happy," but out loud I usually say "Thanks, dear." This took me about 20 years to learn.
ReplyDeletehaha Its a brilliant plan Mrs C has there. I am looking forward to reading your shaving cream story. If it makes you happy that is. :)
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! See, she knows that these small tokens of affection make your day. I do prepare full breakfasts, and we eat them in bed. Only, for my husband, since he sleeps in, the breakfast is usually cold. When he does get up ahead of me and fixes me something, he insists I wake up to eat it! It makes him happy to see me awake...
ReplyDeleteNo fan of breakfast in bed. I'd spill the coffee, the juice, the eggs...
ReplyDeleteBig fan of all the terms of endearment you and Mrs. Cranky have for each other, though. :-)
Hilarious. :)
ReplyDeleteThe only institution set up for breakfast in bed is called hospital, not marriage.
ReplyDeleteBreakfast in bed sounds much better than it is but if you aren't doing the laundry, I guess it might be OK. Dream on.
ReplyDeleteMe thinks she has your number. ;)
ReplyDeleteS
I, too, refuse to make my husband breakfast in bed. How's he gonna eat through that CPAP mask?
ReplyDeletelove what Joanne said in her comment. We're married 33 years and neither one of us (nor the kids) have ever made or had breakfast in bed. I think it is over rated myself.
ReplyDeletebetty
Yeah, I did the breakfast in bed thing for my wife at least two Sundays a month when we were first married. While we are happily married she for the most part does not remember those times. Now she easily remembers everytime I have forgotten to take the trash out, did not unload the dishwasher, or missed a spot on the carpet after vacumming.
ReplyDeleteWhat would happen if you then said, "well it probably won't make me happy, so I'll just get my own breakfast.....since you've already said you're OK without"
ReplyDeleteHmmm?
Perhaps it would prompt her to say "Thank you that would be lovely"?
Can you hear me laughing?
What do people say, "Damned if you do, damned if you don't?" :)
ReplyDeleteYou and Mrs. Cranky have the most interesting way of expressing your love. Always a laugh for me.
Btw, that's a good breakfast you listed. I used to have that often, but not now. I've been brainwashed by all the healthy people who say that it will eventually kill me. What do they know!
Dude! You are funny! I had a broken wrist and ankle at the same time once and Grampy now thinks I should wait on him hand and foot. He says I promised but I don't remember that... He just mumbles "hand and foot woman". Gets him about as far as you got with breakfast in bed!
ReplyDelete