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Wednesday, December 6, 2017

What Could Go Wrong…part too*

What Could Go Wrong…part too*
I survived for the four days that Mrs. C left me alone.  I now only had to pick her up at the airport…what could go wrong? 

Mrs. C left me with several requests.  Pick up the mail, don’t change the settings on the car, don’t lose anything, don’t burn the house down.  Check, check, check and check.  I even did some laundry and cleaned up after myself. 

When she left, she gave me two keys tied together.  One was for mail, the other the house key.  The keys are on lanyards that she made herself when Girl Scouting with her daughter.

There are not many things that upset my wife.  Number one is messing with or losing her stuff…what could go wrong?

The first time I went to the mail box, the key lanyards became undone.  I got the mail, put the mail key lanyard over my gear shift to remind me to pick up the mail every day, and put the house key…somewhere.

Wednesday before I went to the airport for pickup duty, I went to get the house key.  It was not in my hat where I often put stuff that I don’t want to lose, it was not in the box by the door where Mrs. C always puts her keys.  I must have put it in the Jeep front seat compartment.  I would retrieve it after I picked up Mrs. C as I was running late.

All went well on my pick-up run, after all, what could go wrong?  I had to do the circle thing at the airport twice because her baggage retrieval took longer than expected, but all went well**.

Once in the car the thing Mrs. C asked me for was the house key.  I don’t know why she was concerned about the key, other than Mrs. C has a sixth sense for trouble.  I explained that I misplaced it, and that it should be in the Jeep. 

She started getting antsy.

“Relax, the two keys that you tied together came undone, what do you think, that I just tossed the house key all willy nilly?”

“Maybe.”   (Maybe means probably in Mrs. C speak.)

“Relax.” (Never a good idea to tell a woman to relax)

First thing when we got home, I looked in the Jeep for the key.  I did not find it.  I did not find it in the box, it was not in any locks, I looked for it here, I looked for it there, I did not find it anywhere.


“Did you find my key?”

“It will turn up.”

“Wrong answer, you find it now!”

I checked every where I could think, pockets, floor, places it may have fallen, places that made no sense.  I even checked the Jeep a second time.

“I have no idea, I must have become distracted and left it some weird place.”

“I’m going to check your car.”

“I already looked for it in the car twice, I tore the car apart, it is not in the car.”

Mrs. C left to check the car anyway.

Well, between the time I checked the car and the time Mrs. C checked the car someone who must have stolen the key snuck into the garage and replaced the key in the front seat compartment of the Jeep.

All is well again in the Cranky house and with Mrs. C home, what could go wrong?

**The cops don’t let you loiter at the Newark Airport arrival area so you have to circle the airport.


  1. You probably should have attached them to your own key chain temporarily. Or do like some homeless people here when they get a room in a boarding house, they go out for the day and their key is on a long string around their neck so they don't lose it.

  2. So...Mrs. C made a lanyard when Girl Scouting with her daughter, which I assume was a few years back. And the first time you take that lanyard to the mailbox, it comes undone? I certainly hope you are not throwing faulty-lanyard-constructing-skills shade on the Girl Scouts! I think we know where the problem lies with this lanyard that YOU were the last one to touch...

    I also think Mrs. C has a sixth sense for YOU.

    1. just to be clear, no lanyard was damaged in this post. There were two separates keys on two separate lanyards which Mrs. C carelessly tied together with a loop into a loop kind of a way which did not stay looped together.

    2. I stand corrected, my faith in the Girl Scouts restored!

  3. I'm really glad Mrs C didn't knock your head off ...

    I have similar memory problems but only one comes anywhere near this one. Will post mine soon - if I remember! Have to say that yours made me feel slightly better about my memory problems.

  4. In my world, i just don't ask what could go wrong, it's a loaded question. Glad Mrs. C is back home and the key turned up.

  5. Don't feel bad. I know that keys have a tendency to go invisible. I know from repeated experience.

  6. I'm surprised she didn't sew a spare key into your underwear, what could go wrong there? It's not like you would lose your underwear...Right?

  7. She should not leave you alone so you have to go through these things. I think she's setting all this up just so she can call you a jerk. That's what I think.

    Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺

  8. I often have difficulty finding things in plain sight. I wonder if it's a "Man" thing.

  9. I panicked leaving the mall yesterday. I looked all through my purse for my keys and couldn't find them. . .

    They were in the same hand that was holding all my shopping bags!

  10. I did not find it in the box, it was not in any locks, I looked for it here, I looked for it there, I did not find it anywhere. Very Dr. Seussian!!

  11. I usually forget the key in the door (outside, because of course).

  12. Those bleeping gremlins are at it again. Just can't trust the little creeps and they do their best to cast blame on the innocent---aka Cranky. You must give them so much pleasure while giving Mrs C so much ammunition for her "don't you remember the last time I left you alone" file.

  13. That kind of stuff happens to my husband fairly often.

  14. Those sneaky little devils....... they do that all the time to me too.
    They sneak in, borrow my keys and then don't replace them where
    they found them. LOL

  15. It's amazing how certain thieves sneak your items back when someone other than yourself decides to check for them. I hate those kind of thieves.

  16. Next time she leaves you'd best just hibernate in your basement until she returns. Otherwise you'll somehow wind up in deep doodoo.

  17. The best way to find a lost key is to go to ACE hardware to get a replacement made.