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Wednesday, December 13, 2017

4 WEDDINGS…the grooms keep score

4 WEDDINGS…the grooms keep score
Another post on Reality TV, I know many of you are above Reality TV and only watch PBS and the news, so I give you permission to skip this post.
I often watch a show called “4 Weddings.”  No, I am not gay, well maybe a little; my wife makes me watch this show.  The idea is four brides attend each other’s wedding and then grade it on various criteria.  The bride with the best wedding gets sent on a honeymoon in the Caribbean.   Why people who spend upwards of $100,000 on a wedding, need to win a contest to go on a honeymoon is beyond me, but that is the prize.
I love how these brides rate a wedding, the things they find important are interesting, and what one loves, another say’s “I am not a fan of…”
Typical comments:
“The minister talked too much.”  “I thought the minister was funny.”
“I liked their personal vows, but their kiss was too short.” “Loved the kiss, hated the vows.”
“Sally looked heavy in her dress” (Sally was fat, what do you expect?) “Sally’s dress was beautiful.”
“I did not like the signature cocktail.” (What is this signature cocktail thing, and if you don’t like it, don’t drink it!) “The signature cocktail was delicious.”
“The chicken was dry and the steak was raw.”  (Banquet chicken is always dry, and the steak was cooked perfectly, ladies just don’t know that medium rare is pink. Order it medium or medium well, or like my ex-wife ‘burn the shit out of it until there is no juice!’) No bride ever likes the food.
“I was not a fan of the music.” “The music was loud and perfect for dancing.”
“The table decorations were not very fancy.” “The table decorations were tastful.”
Then they complain about things that could not be controlled.
“It was cold”
“It rained.”
“I saw a bug and it creeped me out!”
The final ratings:
“I give this wedding a 4 out of 10” “I give this wedding a 5 out of 10.”
You get the idea.
I’d like to see the same show, only with the grooms rating the wedding.
“I missed the ceremony, I assume they got married.”  “Me too.”
“The cocktail party was great, there was booze.” “I liked the booze.”
“The bride’s maids were hot.”  “I liked the hot bride’s maids.”
“There was food, it was good.”  “I liked the free food.”
“The groom had a tux, very classy.”  “His tux had tales, good choice.”
“There was dancing, the bride’s maids had too much of the signature drink and were loose.” “I liked the dancing and the loose bride’s maids.”
“I got drunk and almost had a date with the blonde bride’s maid until my fiancé stepped in.” “I got drunk and almost had a date with the blonde bride’s maid until my fiancé stepped in.”
“I give this wedding a 10 out of 10.” “I give this wedding a 10 out of 10.”
The brides scoring gives the winner to the bride with the best dress.
The grooms scoring would always end in a tie.


  1. I've heard about those bride shows, never watched one, I don't think they're on here, but I think the winner gets a honeymoon because after paying so much for the wedding they couldn't afford a honeymoon as well. Pity about the losers though, no honeymoon for them, unless the show puts them up at a swanky hotel somewhere.

  2. Lol, not a show I watch, but your version sounds amusing. I've been to some 'interesting' weddings the past few years. It's easy to judge!

  3. OMG. I now have a headache. Sorry, but the world is going to hell in a handbasket.

  4. Heeheehee! When it comes down to it, they are not going to score each other fairly, they are competing for heaven's sake. Each wants the others to lose. Although i can see this as a great way to get ideas for your own dream wedding.

  5. That must be one intense show to sit and watch. I wonder what a male version would look like. Warm greetings!


  6. I'm partial to weddings at Carmel By The Sea, California, with just a minister, the bride, and the groom. Everything else is just fluff. KISS :)

  7. Okay, I read anyway and found no reason not to continue my PBS watching with a Tuesday night switch to NBC for This is Us. It was an amusing post though. Perhaps you could refer to your viewing habits as research for blog material? You know, as opposed to what it otherwise sounds like?

  8. If I want to hear all this bitching I'll watch the news. Just saying.

    Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺

  9. Less rating of the wedding and more attention on the marriage amount of money is going to bail that out. Seriously, we spent 75% more on oour daughters wedding than we did on our own....she bombed out after 8 years, we are at 43 and counting.

  10. You are a brave man to watch. Somehow I am sure if guys planned their own weddings, they would come in on time and under budget.

  11. Sounds like my son's wedding minus the 100,000 bucks.

  12. We've watched this show a few times. Some of the women can be really catty when it comes to rating the other weddings.

  13. I love 4 Weddings! Haven't watched it in a while, though. I used to catch the reruns in the morning, but now I sleep through most of the morning. My favorite parts are the food and the drinks. There's always a complainer who only eats one food, like chicken nuggets, and whines because she wasn't offered any. And HOW DARE one of the brides have a wedding without any alcohol? A dress is a dress. I also wonder where some of these Negative Nancies get off complaining about THE WEATHER!

  14. I laugh over such stupid shows(don't tell dear Mr C please) where people 's personal opinions determine about other eligibility ,sounds funny to me . it should not go this way ,everyone has his own vision for things it cannot low or rise any one else life any way

  15. There was something similar on our TV recently... I didn't watch it.

  16. Not a fan of reality TV. I get enough of that living here in Alabama :)

  17. My wedding gown cost $100.00 & the guests enjoyed their meal--of course, that was 62 years ago!!

  18. I can't comment. I got married in Vegas.