NEW AND IMPROVED

This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Sunday, November 9, 2014

STUPID HEADLINES 110914

STUPID HEADLINES 110914
It is time once again for
Big deal, women marry lawyers every day.
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.

This week TWO headlines are completely made up, guess the fakes and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-doo. 'None of the above' will not be the correct answer.
___________________________________

As people get heavier, crash-test dummies gain weight - WHA WHA WHA WHAT?

Arizona woman loses wedding ring handing out Halloween candy - That's what you get for letting your wedding ring hand out candy.

X-ray shows sick tortoise swallowed turtle pendant - Good thing it wasn't a porcupine.  (Yeah, you're right, that doesn't make any sense.)

Study: Vitamin D, bananas and grapefruit could be a dangerous combination - Especially if taken with large doses of arsenic.

For the first time in 4 years, gas is cheaper than milk - Maybe we need to start fracking cows.

When 'thirty-seven-fifty' for your wine means $3750 - I know it's when I'm in the wrong frickin restaurant.

Deer with vampire fangs spotted for first tine in decades - In the last few decades they have only been striped.

Black Christmas? Store set to open doors at 6 PM December 25 - Suldog set to start a new crusade, "New Years Eve First!"
Man says he'll be eaten alive by anaconda - on TV - Please...bring back Honey Boo Boo
Did Willie smoke pot in the WH? - Nelson or Clinton?

Police say Man With No Hands and No Legs Is Armed and On The Run - Armed maybe, but on the run? Do the police hope to defeat him?

1 in 4 Employers Catch Workers Faking Being Sick - The other three aren't on Facebook.
________________________________

Last week's fake headline was:

University of Idaho to change football name from Idaho Vandals to Idaho Spuds - You just can't offend all those kids with spray paint.
Surprising how many people have heard of the Idaho Vandals!
Including:

I think Idaho Spuds would become Idaho dirtballs in a flash. No, they don't want to change their name.
Who would have thought a Loom loving weaver would know sports.  Visit Joanne and you will find she knows a thing or two about a thing or two!

Idaho football name change. That's my choice for fake news, though the one about the pope sounds funny too.
Another retired lady (actually Joanne isn't retired) who knows her football teams...dang! Checkout Rosaria for common sense, a little poetry and a beautiful Oregon home.

This week I am going with "University of Idaho to change football name from Idaho Vandals to Idaho Spuds."
I knew I wouldn't fool the Mountian Man.  Drop by Dan for a bit of good old North Carolina.

"University of Idaho to change football name from Idaho Vandals to Idaho Spuds". Would the Junior Varsity be the Tater Tots? The cheerleaders could be the French Fries & the fans could be Hash Browns The possibilities are endless!!
Lucky guess! Stop by fishducky's place, the "Comic Page of the internet."

I'm going with "University of Idaho to change football name from Idaho Vandals to Idaho Spuds" it could be a good idea but "eye" just don't see it.
Pay no attention to the bad potato pun, visit Jimmy for his opinions!

I'm going with the Idaho Vandals as the fake headline. Wish I had a funny line to go with my guess, but as they say I got nuthin.'
Another grandma football expert!  What is this world coming to? Drop by B.O.G. for some grandma tips and some grandma fun.

I was leaning towards declaring the Pope fake, but I figured that might not bode well. So make room on the bandwagon for me. I say the Idaho Spuds are not gonna happen. Did Capital One use rampaging potatoes in their credit card commercials? I think not.
It's hard to fool a Thevictorian! Visit Val daily for ...well like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get.

The Fighting Spuds? Umm....no! 
Dang, even Scott!  He usually never even bothers with a guess.  Stop by Scott's for a Texas weather report and to find out what is wrong with Washington, plus car shows, and food reviews and ah hell just visit.


I certainly want the one about Idaho changing their nickname to be false, so I'll go with that one. I've always thought "Vandals" was one of the coolest nicknames for a sports team ever.

Another usual non-guesser, the noted Boston columnist who is sometimes on the same magazine cover as Garrison Keillor could not resist a phony football reference.

Looks like a ton of winner for last weeks headlines.
I'll go with Idaho too. I'm going to follow the crowd this time.
Oh Hell, Sandy is never fooled...her and fishducky!  Unless you are blonde, visit for daily jokes and stuff.  Blondes are apparently not smart enough to understand her material.

Also thanks to Matt Hagy for a headline submission.  Check out his excellent exercise videos @ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC48l-Gxjzq99d5NdgJLvXIw 


Well that was a lot of work.  I hate it when the fake is so easy.  I did not provide links, too lazy and I think all you have to do is click on the names to:

DROP BY TO CONGRATULATE THE WINNERS!!

COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR MORE
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY!! 

17 comments:

  1. going for armed and dangerous this week, crank...

    ReplyDelete
  2. OK, I'm in the position of hoping and praying the one about a store opening on Christmas is the false one. I've got enough on my hands trying to hold back the a-holes on Thanksgiving. I can't fight two fronts at once.

    LOVE the line about fracking cows.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I linked you to Silly Sunday. Well I always do, because these are funny and silly.

    I'll be back later. I have a bad reputation over here.

    Have a fabulous day. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Two!!!
    I know the maroons haven't hijacked Christmas... yet!
    I'm going with vitamin D, bananas and grapefruit.

    O/T if Sully ever visits out here, I'll show him some fracking cows.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I've read/heard all but four of these.. I'll play next time.

    ReplyDelete
  6. It was harder than usual this week & I'm not sure of my answers!! Is it vitamin D & Black Christmas?

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think out of them Black Christmas one :-)

    Have a tanfastic week :-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I will say the vitamin D combo and Willie smoking pot in the White House!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm guessing the deer with the vampire fangs and the Black Christmas. Maybe I'm just hoping against hope that the Black Christmas is fake...

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm guessing deer with vampire fangs and legless man on the run. Not that such a headline couldn't happen!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm going with the Vitamin D, bananas, and grapefruit, because wouldn't millions of tourists have died by now, making Vitamin D form absorbing all that sunlight on the beach, while they swill their banana and grapefruit garnished drinks?

    Also, the vampire deer. Just because that would look so very wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Vitamin D, bananas and grapefruit on Black Christmas sounds like a bad idea, mixing both could cause problems while you are standing in line.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I'll go with the Vitamin D and the turtle pendant.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I really am hoping the man with out hands and legs on the run is the fake, but I'm still not sure. I've heard of several of them this week, though. That's unusual. I must be looking at the news more than before. I need to quit that!

    ReplyDelete
  15. How inept must the cops be when they can't catch a guy with no arms or legs? And if they ever do catch him, I'd like to be there for the obligatory police line up. *getting a visual* ;)

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'm going with "Black Christmas? Store set to open doors at 6 PM December 25" and "Police say Man With No Hands and No Legs Is Armed and On The Run." If anything they make a great combo for guess the fake.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Study: Vitamin D, bananas and grapefruit could be a dangerous combination. I know about grapefruit and certain medications, but not vitamin D and bananas. So this is my first guess.

    On to number two...Black Christmas? Store set to open doors at 6 PM December 25. I think it will happen someday, but it's going to be some time before this becomes a reality.

    Have a fabulous day Cranky. ☺

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!