NEW AND IMPROVED

This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Saturday, April 29, 2017

Stupid Headlines 043017

Stupid Headlines 043017
It’s time again for
Malnutrition at a minimum
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
______________________
Butcher puts nude woman in his display case for 'social experiment' – The woman complained that she felt like just another piece of meat.
Swedish politician wants workers to get paid sex breaks – Why not?  Two or three minutes off each day couldn’t hurt productivity that much.
United Nations elects Saudi Arabia to Women's Rights Commission – What’s next, Jared Fogel head of a boy scout troop?
Declaration of Independence discovery stuns experts – News flash experts, we also won the war.
New Male Sex Robots With Bionic Penises May Just Replace Men For Good! – They are also programmed to lose things and forget to take out the garbage.
Philippine leader Duterte vows to 'eat' ISIS members alive – He will need some fava beans and a little chianti.
Clint Howard divorcing after 22-year marriage – His wife found out he had a cameo performance with Ron’s wife. *
Pregnancy changes a mother's brain for years, study shows – Brain wave changes cause women to clean smutz of faces with a licked thumb and in later years complain that “You never call!”
Proposed shooting range with bar faces opposition from local residents – Oh please!  What could go wrong?
Cocaine bag falls out of man's hat in courtroom – I don’t think this one even needs a comment.
Danica Patrick asks NASCAR for more time to get out of her pajamas to go racing – Maybe she just needs to practice more with her pit crew.
*That is probably mean, but I couldn’t resist…sorry, divorce is never funny…well almost never.
____________________________
And the feel-good news story of the week:
United flight to Texas makes 'terrifying' emergency landing in Costa Rica after engine overheats and malfunctions – Why is this a feel-good news story? Because my son and daughter-in-law were on that plane and now they are safe at home!
__________________________
COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR MORE
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

18 comments:

  1. "Swedish politician wants workers to get paid sex breaks"

    So if Swedish workers get paid to have sex, wouldn't that make them....? OK, I'm good with that. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. That is good news. Glad everyone's okay!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Good for the good news! Glad everyone is okay. Just thinking about that close call makes me nervous.

    Clint Howard's soon-to-be ex-wife should thank her lucky stars that those new male sex robots are ready to hit the market!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happy to hear they made it home. Goes to show we don't worry for nothing when our grown kids go someplace.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Glad the kids made it home, and your headlines are certainly eye-opening.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Now that IS a good news story....real good news.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm all for the feel good story this week, so glad that your son and daughter in law are ok.

    No rain delay at Richmond this weekend so Danica should be Ok.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I like the cocaine one the best. I can see that happening after spending 25 years in law enforcement. There are some really dim criminals out there.

    I linked you to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  9. You have some good ones there, have a happy Sunday

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm glad your son and daughter-in-law are fine as well as everyone on the plane.

    A free night in Costo Rico - good. A $10 meal voucher? Are they kidding?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Dang. I'm glad them young'un are ok.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Got a giggle out of "Two or three minutes" not hurting productivity:)
    So glad your family is safe. That is great news.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am glad that your son and daughter-in-law are home safe.

    ReplyDelete
  14. That last one is scary. Glad it all turned out okay.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I know this one is true: "Philippine leader Duterte vows to 'eat' ISIS members alive." and that is why I don't travel overseas anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I bet the Butcher made a lot of folks vegetarians after that stunt. We had an article in our paper about a man who called 911 because someone stole his heroin. I guess it's really true, you can't cure stupid.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Male Sex Robots, huh? Will they kill spiders and change tires, too?

    Glad your son and daughter-in-law are all right!!!

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!