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Saturday, November 5, 2011

WHY MEN HOLD THE REMOTE

WHY MEN HOLD THE REMOTE


Some people may find this to be a chauvinistic post.  It is not.  It would be chauvinistic if the conclusions were based on women’s inferiority.  The conclusion of this post is based not on innate ability, but on basic gender differences deep in the DNA of our species.

There are several reasons why man controls the remote. 

Historically, from the days of the first 8” screen TV’s, man has handled the channel searching duties.  Women did not get up to manually turn the dial; it was the man’s job.  With the advent of the remote control it was only natural that man continued the channel changing function.

Genetically, man is wired to be the hunter gatherer, women are the nurturers.  Channel surfing is a hunter gathering function.  Men know when to pause over a show and then move on to something better.  Men will skip a commercial, surf on, and know just when to return.  Men know the territory.  They skip over normally unproductive stations and go right to the primary hunting grounds.  Men know their tool.  They utilize the “PREVIOUS” button, and all search functions.

Women, being nurturers, linger on stations.  They want to give every show a chance; they hate to say no by hitting that channel-up arrow.  Women do not skip commercials, they are mesmerized by them.  Women are unfamiliar with the territory.  They will waste precious time on “Lifetime” when there might be an Ultimate Cage fighting match on the next channel.  Women do not utilize the “PREVIOUS” button, and they prefer to watch at least a small snippet of every channel before moving on.  When a woman finally settles on a show, it is over.

Women are not committed to the TV.  When a man watches TV, he concentrates on TV.  Women multitask while watching.  Women can read and follow a show.  Women can watch while working on the laptop.  Women can enjoy a TV show while also timing a roast in the oven, or a meal on the stove.  Operating the remote requires total concentration.  Thought wavering to a different task can result in a missed opportunity for a better show.  Without total concentration, a commercial linger may miss a home run or a blocked punt on a different channel.

Women can multi-task, but men can multi-view.  Men can follow multiple shows, particularly sports while women can sometimes become confused.  A quick flip from the Giants game to the Packers and women want to know why the players changed uniforms.  A quick surf from “Two and a half Men” to “Seinfeld” takes several minutes of explaining to a woman.

If man gives up the remote, instead of watching a sitcom, an old movie and a football game in any one hour, he is subjected to “Say Yes to the Dress” and “Dancing with the Stars.”

If man is to maintain any dignity at all in his home, he must continue to control the remote!  

10 comments:

  1. This is great! But this is also the reason for TiVo. :)

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  2. So true...with the exception of the commercials. I detest them and avoid them at all costs. It's my husband who asks me to un-mute the commercials!

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  3. Never understood the muting commercials thing, just change the channel!

    I do change the channel. If the man is in control of the remote I am subjected to hours of sports only.

    Then again, there is the DVR, which is a lifesaver. Remote to fast-forward through the commercials only, and shows are over more quickly. Men and women alike can indulge in this activity. Technology rocks!

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  4. Well, nice theory, but I control the remote in our house...my husband isn't even sure how to use it!

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  5. haha so true -- only i happen to love the UFC & two & half men so my hunny & i can come to a happy medium a good portion of the time. only he never watches my *chick* stuff & always controls the remote... i just wasn't aware he was hunting & gathering by doing so? heh!

    anywho...
    thanks for playing along in my *no more muffin top blog hop* -- you rock!!!
    ♥cyn♥
    misadventures of a chunky goddess

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  6. Very funny! And some truth to it. Although, in this household, I do change the channels through adverts or better still, record the show and watch it later so that I can forward my way through the adverts!

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  7. I'm not sure we should give up remote priveleges simply because your sex is unable to multitask. :D

    An excuse for TIVO/Foxtel IQ/Seperate TVs if I ever heard one. :-)

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  8. So funny but seriously the complete opposite in our house - I love to channel surf and switch channels like a mad woman. My husband, on the other hand, will sit and sit on some nightmarish show about "How to make soda" for the entire hour it's on - Most of the time I take the remote over or go to another tv

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