Stupid Headlines 050921
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
Gettysburg battlefield visitor trapped in porta-potty by downed tree – For one half score, and a few hours, some poor father tried to extricate himself wondering whether this potty or his body would soon survive.
Hundreds of Joshes fight in Nebraska – In the preliminary, three Melvin’s had a rock, paper, scissors duel off.
Red Lobster shares biscuit corsage, boutonniere video for prom – They wouldn’t last very long on my lapel, those biscuits are mmm, mmm, GOOD!
New Jersey offering free beer for COVID-19 vaccine recipients – Not me! I don’t trust them and I’m not going to risk my health on an untested…wait…FREE BEER!
Biden says Americans earning less than $400K will not pay 'a single penny' in taxes – Unless you are still breathing!
Car drives onto car to avoid cat – The cat would have moved to get out of the way, except it is a CAT!
2 California homes invaded by hundreds of birds down their chimneys – Tippi Hedren was heard screaming, “I said cut…cut!”
Great horned owl travels hundreds of miles trapped in truck’s grille – Sometimes you’re the Owl, sometimes you’re the truck grille.
Michigan man builds 'poop wall’ after dispute with neighbor – Good fences make good neighbors; poop fences make poopy neighbors.
Kamala Harris and Doug Emhoff, both vaccinated, kiss with their masks on – You should see them eat soup!
FEEL GOOD STORY OF THE WEEK
Not so much feel good, as…Damn, What an Amazing Lady!!
Idaho school shooting: Teacher who disarmed student felt like angel was guiding her
And Happy Mother's Day to all you great moms!