STUPID HEADLINES 050221
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sometimes sophomoric comments.
Beavers reportedly knock out cell phone and internet service in Canadian town – And they didn’t give a damn!
NZ Rugby debates selling All Blacks to US investors – If you did not know that the All Blacks are a famous rugby team in New Zealand, this one would be disturbing.
Skunk stuck inside Chick-fil-A cup rescued by Colorado police – The new ‘Skunk-Fil-A’ special did not sell very well.
Women lost $800 billion in income last year – Check the old shoes in the closet, that’s where my wife hides the money.
Biden says Stacey Abrams could be president if 'she wants’ – Don’t we get to vote?
Getting a joint mortgage? Here’s how your credit score factors in – Damn, they just made the stuff legal in New Jersey and now it’s so expensive you need a mortgage to buy it?
More than 100,000 bees set up shop in woman's home for third time – Now that is suffering from a bad case of hives!
McDonald's robber demands chicken nuggets, has to accept breakfast food because it was still too early – Well, OK, I’ll be back at noon, and I’ll expect the nuggets and all your cash then, so don’t try any funny business!
Bored supermarket shopper parks in all 211 spaces of parking lot over 6 years – Bored…is that the new term for “Bat-shit crazy?”
People are ready to have sex again: Condom sales are surging – This may be a result of relaxing the 6-foot distancing advise.
*bonus sophomoric comment to this headline:
Surging and condom should never be used in the same sentence. ( Hmmm…my thirteen-year-old self also has to question the use of Bonus and a condom headline.)
FEEL-GOOD STORY OF THE WEEK
Husky Finds A Box Full Of Stray Kittens In The Woods And Decides To Become Their New Mom – Ok, Ok I know, another dog story…sorry, I am a sucker for a good dog story.