THE WAY THINGS ARE
Some things just happen and they just happen wrong. There is no rhyme or reason for them to always happen, they just do. The law that explains this phenomenon is Murphy’s Law:
"If something can go wrong, it will."
This is of course a very broad assertion. There are more specific corollaries to this law.
1. If you have to loosen several screws to remove an object, the head of the last screw will be stripped.
2. If you only have one nail left you will bend the crap out of it on the first whack of the hammer.
3. When making a sandwich, you will cook the bacon, slice the tomatoes, rinse the lettuce and toast the bread before you realize you have no mayonnaise.
4. The cable company will wait to test their system just before you find out how much the medieval sling-shot is worth on "Pawn Stars."
5. If you have only one last screw that you need to finish a job, you will drop it.
6. The last pistachio nut in a batch will have a rotten bitter taste.
7. If you drop the last screw that you really need, it will hit your foot and bounce where you will not see and you will not find it.
8. You remember you are out of toilet paper when you most need toilet paper.
9. When you come back from the hardware store with a screw to replace the one you lost, you will immediately find the screw that you dropped.
10. If you write a 700 word post and forget to periodically hit save, your computer will close unexpectedly.
I suppose there are more to the list, that’s all I’ve got for know.
re-run from January 2015
Who was Murphy anyway? Life would have been much easier had he not invented his stupid law.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
Ah yes, No 8 taught me to get organised!
ReplyDeleteNumber 6 resonates with me. I feel that way about other nuts, too.
ReplyDeleteI am thinking you lost a lot of nuts and screws over the years. Mine is if you are running late to something you will get every single red light. Happens all the time to me.
ReplyDeleteBetty
If you are in the gym locker room the only two guys there will have lockers side-by-side. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Murphy was a surgeon do to the many things that have happened in the operating room on any given day. Losing a screw in the OR however can't be fixed by a trip to the store. (Don't worry, we have backups to the backup for Dr. Murphy)
ReplyDeleteMe & Murphy are old friends... when I was planning for early retirement in 2015, I told my sister I wouldn't go thru with it if I couldn't get affordable health insurance. She said "Why are you so worried about that? You've never been to the doctor even once!" 5 months after I retired, I was getting my kidney operated on!
ReplyDeleteI was smiling or laughing all the way through. How did you know all the times Murphy and I got together?
ReplyDeleteThese are ever so true. Murphy's Law is alive and well.
ReplyDeleteI linked this post to Happy Tuesday.
Have a fabulous day, Joe. 😎
sometimes one just has to say "Screw it!"
ReplyDeleteOMG, here I thought I was the only one that had these experiences. Repeatedly.
ReplyDeleteThere is no excuse EVER, for running out of toilet paper, and who runs out of mayonnaise?? In my family, whatever condiment is in use in the fridge, has a backup waiting in the pantry.
ReplyDeleteIf there are teenagers in the house and you do not have a backup they often return the jar with nothing but scrapings and not inform anyone that we are out of mayo.
DeleteIt is not necessarily running out of toilet paper, but when the paper is in a hall closet and you are on the throne. It happens!
you made me laugh badly dear Joe
ReplyDeletebut with each i can relate except no toilet paper here but only water
reminded me a movie or show watched long ago
intensity of scene was unforgettable how man stuck into wild cave was trying to lit up the last match stick which was only way to save his life in bitter cold night
nicely done and so natural yes list is infinite