|I want to blow my top...literally!|
Tuesday, January 29, 2019
RIP Perfectly Good Words
RIP Perfectly Good Words
I am constantly annoyed by the changing vocabulary of our times. Perfectly good words have been replaced by words that lose their power. Simple phrases change and their meaning is distorted. It is painful, but I am learning to get over it, life moves on, a word is just a word, still it is my prerogative as an old person to dislike any change.
I like nice things. I like things that are even nicer than others. We used to say they were VERY nice. For instance, the other night we went to a restaurant that was very nice. Nothing today is very nice, very has been replaced with SUPER. Nothing is VERY nice any more, it is SUPER nice. SUPER which used to mean extra VERY, now simply means VERY. In the process, VERY has been dumped, and SUPER has been stripped of its power.
At this SUPER nice restaurant, our waitress was SUPER helpful except for one thing I found SUPER annoying. When ever I said “Thank you” for her SUPER helpfulness, she told me, “No problem.”
What happened to “You're welcome”? “You're welcome” meant that the person was “happy to help”, “glad to be of service”, “My pleasure”.
“No problem” means it is not a problem.
WTF? If I thought it was a problem, I would not have asked…what am I an animal? When I asked, “May I have more water please?” Not for one second did I think that would be a problem, it is your job, why would, your job be a problem? I said “please” because I don’t want to treat you like a non-person. “No problem” indicates if getting me the water was an inconvenience, then I could just go scratch.
GOL DAMMIT, stop with the “NO PROBLEM” and just let me know “I’M WELCOME!”.
I might need some meds! Still it is SUPER simple.
If people would just go back to “You're welcome” it would be great. That’s right “GREAT”, not “AWESOME.” Awesome used to mean “really extra super great”, but thanks to pea brain people today, AWESOME has lost its power. We have no words that mean awesome.
The AWESOME Grand Canyon is now compared to an awesome pizza you had the other night.
When did a fun time become “EPIC”? EPIC used to be a great word reserved for events which “LITERALLY” only happened on SUPER rare occasions. Crap, I can’t explain what EPIC used to mean, because “LITERALLY” which used to mean “Exactly without exaggeration” now means “FIGURATIVELY” or “Not actually, but you get the picture…a lot”.
Then there is “ACTAULLY” which used to mean… “It really happened” but now is used for no friggin reason what-so-ever.
“Did you have breakfasted this morning?” “Yes, ACTUALLY I did.”
WTF! Just say YES!
Why does the response to every question today start with “SO”? Does this only bother me?
“How much is ten times ten?”
“So, ten times ten equals 100.” Even worse, “So, ten times ten ACTUALLY equals 100.”
“It makes me so angry, I actually blow my top.” Well actually I figuratively blow my top, on account of even after I am no longer angry, I still have my top, but I shouldn’t have to say figuratively because clearly, I still have my top.
Hell, I can’t even go on anymore, it is literally bothering me, well it is actually bothering me…shit, this is SUPER confusing.
SO, I’m done.