FECAL HERE, FECAL THERE, FECAL MATTER EVERYWHERE!
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| This cranky re-run is from December 2012 |
Media outlets now have a new go-to-story when it is a slow news day. Swabbing stuff! It turns out if you swab just about anything and analyze it you will find the object is chock full of germs, saliva, semen, urine and a good deal of the time…gasp…oh the horror…FECAL MATTER!!
Swab a hand rail…germs…and…fecal matter!
Swab a door knob…germs…and…you guessed it!
Swab the floor, swab a wall, swab a public water fountain, swab pocket change, swab dollar bills, swab virtually anything and the result:
“MORE GERMS AND YES…EVEN FECAL MATTER is on everything!
So what do these media geniuses recommend? Don’t touch anything. If you do touch anything, wash your hands. Carry anti-bacterial gel with you and rub it on your hands about 100 times a day. Stay away from kids, stay away from damp areas, and stay away from FECAL MATTER!
The economy has jumped on the germ phobic bandwagon. TV advertises steam cleaners, disinfectant sprays, and cleaning agents of every kind to kill germs and…yes…even…FECAL MATTER! They even sell a disinfectant soap dispenser that shoots out a dollop of soap without having to touch a dirty old soap dispenser pump because that pump may have germs and or FECAL MATTER!
Oh, don’t forget our public water supply, it is loaded with chemicals such as lead and arsenic and yes…even…FECAL MATTER!
If you add these swab stories to the studies that show our dry food has a certain percentage of insect parts, our meats have a percentage of salmonella and FECAL MATTER, and the air we breathe is loaded with carcinogens, germs and even microscopic specs of FECAL MATTER you can come to only one conclusion:
Do not touch anything, do not eat anything, and do not breathe anything without first disinfecting, boiling and or filtering it.
All this information is great to know. I can only imagine how many germs and …you know…I have consumed over the years without knowing it.
Studies have proven that FECAL MATTER taken in small doses over seven or eight decades can prove fatal. This was particularly disturbing to me when I finally Googled FECAL MATTER.
Oh Shit!
Disgusting, isn't it? It's everywhere, I mean, everything that eats creates it. Flies, fleas, and even dust mites leave it all over the place. Panic people, panic!
ReplyDelete;-)
I read a few short years ago that antibacterial products were really messing up with people's immune health. That the body actually can function okay with some germs and was shutting down on fighting germs because of what was out there to stop germs from happening. It was even suggesting not washing hands after going to the bathroom was a good thing. I won't go to that extreme (not washing hands) but I don't wipe down the shopping cart with wipes before I use it (except I will say when shopping with grandson we do have one of those material things that straps onto the cart and he is touching that rather than the cart itself). However, when shopping with dad, who doesn't use that, but wipes down the cart with wipes, the success story is the same. No major sickness at 15 months of age. People complain when going to doctors. They expect an antibiotics. Its a no way situation. I'm glad I'm relatively healthy.
ReplyDeleteOmg Joe, I can't even watch those shows anymore because they make my skin crawl. I am the WORST when it comes to hotel stays. I'd seriously rather sleep in my car. Soooo disgusting. Yep, that shit is everywhere! - New post up. :)
ReplyDeleteI actually didn't know what Fecal was (shame on me) so I looked it up - and wish I hadn't. At my advanced stage in life I ask myself - do I need to worry? Or put it another way, how the hell did I get here!!
ReplyDeleteI actually didn't know what Fecal was (shame on me) so I looked it up - and wish I hadn't.
Oh God Joe - we are all going to die aren't we??? Oh, hang on ...
ReplyDeleteThat s*** has been around since life appeared on this planet.....somehow we've all lived through it. Amazing.
ReplyDeleteIt's not all bad! My daughter, who is an RN, was part of a pioneering experiment of treating C Diff with . . . . Fecal matter! Basically, a poop transplant.
ReplyDeleteI don't get too worried about fecal matter.
Sorry, Bijoux, but 'poop transplant' is just about the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. . .
Delete;)
But,but, but...we have survived all this stuff for decades even.
ReplyDeleteNo, no, no. Germs and fecal everywhere. How in the world did I live to be so old. I've never been very worried about germs. We seem to live together in perfect harmony most of the time.
ReplyDeleteIt's all about the poop Joe, it's everywhere and we can't do anything about it, can't hardly wash the poop off your hands with poop on the soap and in the water, we could wear rubber gloves but they are only clean until you touch something.....
ReplyDeleteGerms and bacteria are everywhere. I imagine humans have evolved to be immune to much od this, but knowing it is disturbing.
ReplyDeleteIt is everywhere and there isn't much we can do about that. Some, but not much.
ReplyDeleteHave a un-poopy day, Joe. ☺
i guess it's up to you to get to the bottom of this, Joeh.....
ReplyDeleteSo, uh. . . eat shit and die, I guess. . .
ReplyDeleteWell you made me laugh at the end, anyway.
ReplyDeleteHum, it is only 2 PM and pretty sure I haven't gotten in my daily portion of Fecal matter except what was on the lawn mower handle. I'd better go shopping or I'll never make my quota.
ReplyDeleteYou're full of s--t, Joe, as apparently we all are!!
ReplyDeleteLike your mother said, wash your hands before you eat. Beyond that, don't worry too much about it.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'm not reading all that, because I will be staying in a hotel this weekend, and I don't want to think about it. But I DO remember writing about the poop transplants a year or two ago. Whoops! Looks like it was FOUR years ago.
ReplyDeletehttp://unbaggingthecats.blogspot.com/2013/01/what-we-have-here-is-success-to.html
So since YOU began paying attention to media outlets, there's fecal matter everywhere? Seems to me you're at least partially to blame for this, Joe. ;)
ReplyDeleteAren't we a bundle of cheer :) Not leave me alone. I have to go wash my hands.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteyou had to google to discover what Fecal Matter is? (*~*)
ReplyDeleteWell, I try and keep my fecal matter to my toilet so don't blame me.
ReplyDeleteEye shut, hands over ears, loudly sings "Lalalalala."
ReplyDeleteCan't hear a thing you're writing. I'm safe.