STUPID HEADLINES 050717
It’s
time again for
 |
| The guns do need to have a silencer |
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid
headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
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Yale grad students' 'hunger strike'
apparently involves eating when hungry – And if that doesn’t work, they will hold their breath
until they feel discomfort.
Wild Boars Go on Rampage in Iraq,
Kill Three ISIS Jihadists – This almost made the Feel-Good story of the week.
United cremated giant bunny without
her permission – If
I was still doing a find the fake news story, I would definitely choose this as
the fake…it’s real.
Bacteria-laden mosquitoes unleashed
in Florida to combat virus – Somehow this does not sound like a very good idea!*
Colorado animal sanctuary kills all
its animals - sanc·tu·ar·y: a place
of refuge or safety…maybe not!
US has not found 'one dollar' of drug
lord El Chapo's assets – Another Madoff client?
High school senior doesn't have date
for prom, she takes Harvard acceptance letter instead – Acceptance to Harvard is better than
a date with a pimply faced 18 year-old any day.
Kansas City Catholics banish Girl
Scouts and their cookies – The heck with the cookies, who are the Kansas City Catholics? If that is a minor league baseball team, I
find the name offensive. Do they wear
funny Pope hats on the field?
Bombay Sapphire Gin recalled after
bottles discovered to contain 77 percent alcohol – After a couple of shots of 77 percent
(100 proof is 50%) I’m pretty sure I couldn’t recall
anything!
'DWTS'' David Ross' dance partner
farts in his face – One,
two, poof-poof-poof.
Library fines too stressful for
Harvard students – If
library fines are stressful, how the heck do these kids make it through final
exams?
*Actually,
the unleashed mosquitoes are sterile males that do not bite. They will hopefully mate and the eggs will
not hatch…them scientists are pretty slick!
The Feel-Good story of the week:
Canadian Crowd Belts Out U.S.
National Anthem When Mic Fails – “Oh Canada”…we love ya!
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COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR MORE
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
I guess those Yale students know how to GO on a hunger strike. They just don't know how to STAY on a hunger strike. Kind of like an airport rental car agency knows how to TAKE a reservation, but not how to HOLD a reservation...
ReplyDeleteThe visual of the Kansas City Catholics will have me giggling all day.
ReplyDeleteThey sure did 'belt it out'....makes 'ya proud don't it?
ReplyDeleteIt's also kind of scary that we know all the words to yours....do you know ours?
Delete"O Canada, la la la la la la, la la la la, la la la, la, la, la the"
DeleteBut we still love ya!
And we love you.....
DeleteThe world gets crazier and crazier doesn't it. Yes it does.
ReplyDeleteI linked you to Silly Sunday.
Have a fabulous day, Joe. ☺
Think wild boars doing anything in Iraq is surprising, how dare they?
ReplyDeleteBeing a Michigan girl, the Canadians have always had a special place in our hearts so I am not at all surprised at their camaraderie in the stands. Makes me smile. :) - And really, who are the Kansas City Catholics?? Did Raquel Welsh convert and take the whole roller derby team with her??? :) - Great headlines. The DWTS farting... Eeewww...
ReplyDeleteI ALWAYS love your headlines posts!!
ReplyDelete"Yale grad students' 'hunger strike' apparently involves eating when hungry."
ReplyDeleteYeah, sacrifice is a foreign concept to these Snowflakes.
Do ya suppose wild boars are our new WMD? Clever if they are.
ReplyDeleteEl Chapo is better at hiding it than our government is at finding it -- why does that not surprise me?
ReplyDeleteGlad you got another Florida headline into your "Stupid Headlines" post!
ReplyDeleteRead this for a stupid headline that really hit close to home:
http://www.12newsnow.com/news/shoplifting-suspect-impales-self-with-stolen-knife-police-say/437638690
I really laughed at the wild boars incident killing ISIS terrorists. Too bad Moslems don't eat pork.
ReplyDeleteBut apparently, pork eats Muslims. . . (*ba-doomp!*)
DeleteHmmm. . . At Yale, they fast until they get hungry; at Harvard, they get panic attacks over library fines. . . Maybe it's an Ivy League thing. . .
ReplyDeleteBut honestly, I don't know what's so threatening about library fines; just bring your gun. . .
My wife and I were once given free Canadian flags for singing 'O Canada' to the Canadian Chamber of Commerce folks at a Canada Day festival in Up North, Michigan. . .
Funny and disturbing headlines; students on a hunger strike eating when hungry sounds so true, just to mention one of the headlines.
ReplyDelete