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Saturday, January 14, 2017

Stupid Headlines 011517


Stupid Headlines 011517

It’s time again for
At least those they interviewed never complained
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY

This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 

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Nude woman steals sheriff's car, claims she was poisoned – Some people die when poisoned, some take off their clothes and steal a cop car.

Two employees are suing Microsoft, alleging their jobs gave them PTSD – Can you not quit a job with Microsoft?

Vegan Denied Swiss Passport Over ‘Annoying’ Campaign Against Cowbells – They’re murderers, they’re rapists, and they hate cowbells.

Johnny Manziel's Next Move: Charging Fans For Selfies – A professional has been before he ever was…sad.

Monopoly might ditch classic game pieces for emojis – Oh the humanity! They took away my iron, don’t take my thimble!

Man recently named 'Principal of the Year' charged with statutory rape – They are renaming the award to: “Pretty good Principal of the year…except for that sex thing.”

Cops cuff volunteers for feeding the homeless in Florida – Pigeons yes, homeless no.

Teen accused of being fake doctor indicted in Virginia – Am I the only one who misread this?

USC Female Empowerment Group Scraps Word ‘Women’ For Being ‘Alienating’ – Group prefers “Non-football watching, beer swilling, belching and farting persons”.

Obama's dog Sunny reportedly bites White House guest – Guests to the White House should probably wait another week before wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat.

Madoff reportedly cornered the hot chocolate market in prison – Very impressive Bernie, you’re a genius…also a dick/asshole/crap-head/putz.  Enjoy your business acumen ripping off fellow miscreants…it would be too bad if you pissed them off.

 AND THE FEEL-GOOD STORY OF THE WEEK

Faithful Dog Saves Injured Owner From Freezing Temperatures – A cat would have just moved on.


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Come Back Next Week For More

STUPID HEADLINES!!

16 comments:

  1. "Teen accused of being fake doctor indicted in Virginia"

    I wonder what kind of fake doctor this teenager was? My guess is an OB/GYN. ;)

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  2. An excellent assortment as usual. Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!

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  3. I read "Man accused..." and had to go back after reading your comment. Although these days some doctors do look like teenagers to me.

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  4. The cat would have fetched the neighbor much earlier. But, the dog did a good job.

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    Replies
    1. A cat would have gone to a neighbor's house to be fed!!

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  5. I linked you to Silly Sunday and I laughed out loud at Skip's comment.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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    Replies
    1. Humorous comments from readers are encouraged!

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  6. I really do enjoy reading your Sunday postings.

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  7. You have me trained. Now when I see a weird headline in the news, I immediately think of you. I was thinking Sunny might show up here. Keep'em coming joeh.

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  8. "Cops cuff volunteers for feeding the homeless in Florida" It is a shame some towns was laws against helping people. They have their police going after stupid stuff instead of real crime.

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  9. I hope one of those Microsoft litigants is the person who called me about problems with my Windows Computer, prompting me to scream at the top of my lungs into the phone: "NO! MY COMPUTER IS BROKEN?" He hung up really fast. I suppose if everybody he called did that to him, it could be stressful...

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  10. I chuckled when I read that Bernie Madoff story. How the mighty have fallen.

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  11. Well, at least the nude woman stealing a cop car wasn't able to carry a concealed weapon!

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  12. Nooooo. They can't take the Monopoly pieces. I didn't know they took the iron. My game still has it. I don't want them to take the dog!

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