STUPID HEADLINES 080716
It is time again for
Oh That NY Post |
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This
week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
_________________________________
Woman Puts Poison On Her Vagina To Kill Her Husband
When He Went Down On Her – Lick on
sick chick kills quick.
This rare disease brews beer in your stomach – “Yes officer, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.”
Dog crashes car into West
Virginia Walmart – I’ve got
nothing that can top this line in the actual story “A second dog riding shotgun somehow rolled down the passenger window
after the collision.”
Most
of world’s biggest beasts could be extinct by 2100 –
This is horrible, worse than global warming…what…Oh, beasts…never
mind
Virginia cops bust drivers for driving without ice
cream – DWIC; it’s only illegal on a hot day.
Police in New York hunt
bandits who made off with pet bunny – Clearly a slow crime day in the City.
Woman refused entry to Six Flags for wearing T-shirt –
Well yeah, everyone knows Wednesday
is “bare your tits Wednesday” at Six Flags!
Man Carrying an UZI in Downtown Hagerstown Held on
200K Bond- Can’t a man hunt deer
downtown anymore?
California
Deems August ‘Muslim Appreciation and Awareness Month.’ – A month? Not to be politically incorrect, but Jews and
Christians don’t get a month …Hell bacon only gets one day! Also,
what about separation of Church and State, where is the ACLU?
Man
gets prison for poaching nearly 1,000 Venus Flytraps ...Doesn't everyone know it is just wrong to
poach Venus flytraps? They should be lightly salted and fried.
This job interview question was just
banned in Massachusetts – “Do you know how to paak a caar?”
Bionic butt could lead to better
prostrate exams – The
six-million dollar can?
___________________________
Come
back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINES
Yeah, I missed beasts the first time, too
ReplyDeleteI misread it, too!!
DeleteThe joyriding dogs headline was fantastic.
ReplyDeleteBut it's also nice to know how appreciated I am in California. I wonder what I did to be so appreciated.
There are a few people i know who'd love to have "the beer brewed itself in my stomach, i have a disease" as their excuse!
ReplyDeletehave a nice day Joe
ReplyDeletei liked salted and fried. :)
ReplyDeleteYour comments are far funnier than the headlines. I linked this post to Silly Sunday.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day. ☺
So you can brew beer in your stomach? Really? Do you first have to eat a hops and barley salad, and wash it down with some pure, Rocky Mountain spring water? ;)
ReplyDeleteThis rare disease of beer brewing in your stomach is something new.
ReplyDeleteI missed beasts at first glance also probably because of whose blog I am reading. Think that is called a conditioned response to your post.
ReplyDeleteI always look forward to your funny comments on these headlines.
ReplyDeleteWhile my 13-year-old-self would appreciate the extinction of the biggest beasts, and the bare-your-tits Wednesday at Six Flags...I had to prohibit that self from reading your post this week, due to entry though the poison vagina!
ReplyDeleteThere are so many easier ways to kill your husband...
ReplyDeleteWhat Pixel Peeper said. . .
ReplyDelete