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Monday, August 29, 2016

10S NE 1

10S NE 1
That talented blogger “The Chubby Chatterbox” is losing weight.  I guess he will soon be changing the name of his blog to “The Chatterbox.” He recently published a very funny post on his taking up tennis to get exercise and help in his weight loss.
I hate tennis!
It is great exercise and I encourage The Chatterbox to continue…still,
I hate tennis!
I played in the 80’s.  I think everyone played in the 80’s.  In those day it was difficult finding an empty court.  Today I see empty courts all the time.  Our townhome association has two courts.  I have never seen them used.
I did enjoy playing for a time, and I loved watching the pros.  I went to the US Open several times in Flushing, New York.  I even had a picture taken with Arthur Ashe, the tennis great whom the main court in Flushing is named after.  I have no idea where that photo is today.
I stopped watching tennis when the tennis brats, Connors and McEnroe left the game.  I enjoyed their complaining and whining antics.  I dislike the “polite rules” of the game.  Tennis fans even complain about “grunters,” players who grunt loudly after every shot.
Why do I hate tennis?
1.    It is a snotty sport played by snotty country club snots.
2.    Dress and style is important.  At one time only all white was acceptable.  Style should not be important in sports.
3.    Opponents cheat.  When your very best shot turns into a losing point because your opponent calls “Just out by an inch” when it was clearly in by an inch, it is infuriating.
4.    My ex-wife was a human backboard and I could not beat her.  Rallies went POW, bloop, POW, bloop, POW, bloop, POW and out.  And yes I am misogynist and a poor loser.
5.    I never got hurt, but a lot of people I knew ended up getting knee operations and had messed up ligaments…it is not an old person game.
6.    People are polite, phony, but polite.  In a sport that is one against one, I could not stand having to say “nice shot” when a ball is drilled by you.  Do boxers say, “nice punch” when they take one to the chops?  I’ll shake hands after a game, but during the game you are my enemy!
7.    8. 9. and 10.  My ex-wife loves tennis!
 Well, that’s just me, apparently it is not a good game for a cranky person.  It is good exercise and I encourage The Chatterbox to keep playing.


  1. Well, yeah. But then there's Steffi Graf...............

  2. In the late 1970s in Southern California it was hard to get a court to play, yet me and those that I hanged around with tried to do so. We were never that good, but we sure had fun. Now close to 40 years later, I still watching a good match up on the TV


  3. i never had good hand/eye coordination in order to make the hits the few attempts i made.

  4. If I am going to watch tennis, it has to be a men's match and they have to have good legs. Otherwise, I have no time ...

    1. Male tennis pros generally have great butts, too!!

  5. I loved tennis when I was young, but I didn't wear all white and I wasn't a snob. It is great exercise, but if your older you need to be careful of injuries. It's a fast moving game.

    Thanks for the laughs about your ex-wife.

    Have a terrific day Joe. ☺

  6. I love tennis too! I do wear my little tennis outfit but Im not a snob, I dont think.
    WTG for Chubby Chatterbox. Keep it up.

  7. As I read this delightful post the title kept churning in my head. Then it hit me.

    Guffawed out loud I did.

    Good post Joe!

  8. Thanks for the shout out! The thing I like most about tennis is that I get an aerobic workout without realizing it. People with legs as short as mine aren't designed for running, so I need to trick myself into being more active. Take care.

  9. I only watch the men play...wonder why that is? I miss Agassi and McEnroe, though.

  10. When I was young, someone told me that if I played tennis too much, I'd end up with one arm that looked freakishly larger than the other.

    I was always afraid to play because I wanted symmetrical arms.

  11. My son was a very good player and was ranked in the Junior USTA for many years. We were sad when he gave up playing in college, but he claims he can't find anyone to actually play.

  12. I didn't realize the public had bailed on the sport. I remember the heydays and was flailing away with the many in the 80's also. Kudos to Chatterbox. Exercise designed as fun is always a plus. Kind of like golf with out the carts.

  13. Yes, i tried tennis, yes, i stunk, no, i'm not interested in watching or trying it again, yes, The Chatterbox should continue if it's his thing.

  14. I tried tennis in high school and found I had no talent. I mean NO talent. More recently I took a liking to the rather attractive (read: hot!) female tennis players. I was impressed until I discovered women's beach volleyball. Need I say more? ;)

  15. Come to Alabama and we'll have a pig toss. We'll invite your x and see how she measures up I a REAL sport :)

  16. I don't like tennis or any other sport that requires a ball to be headed towards my face. I literally can't spot the ball until it is just about to bonk me on the nose.

  17. I never liked playing tennis. Only did so when I had to take a class in it in college. We had a middle-aged man in our class who had a real job as a butcher, and spent a lot of time in the freezer, and had equilibrium problems from water in his ears.

    I think I could almost beat him, some days.

  18. Tennis is most enjoyable when you make up your own rules .... 'cause the 'real' rules suck.


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