THE GOOD PATIENT
For several
years now I have had an infection problem with a tooth. Antibiotics would resolve the issue for a
year or so, but then the problem would come back. Monday I had the problem resolved permanently.
Extraction.
The process
took about twenty-five minutes. Fifteen
minutes was waiting for the Novocain to work its magic. It was a fairly painless procedure. The worst part was taking the Novocain needle,
and then listening to the crackle crunch of tooth/bone. When it was all over I was given some
instructions, some gauze, and a prescription for Tylenol 3 for pain relief.
This Friday
Mrs. Cranky went to the same doctor with the same problem for the same
resolution.
Extraction.
The process
also took about twenty-five minutes. When
done Mrs. C felt fine, good enough to drive home.
“Well, that wasn’t so bad, even the
Novocain needle didn’t hurt.”
“Yeah, I didn’t like the shot, or the
crackle/crunch of tooth and bone, but otherwise it wasn’t so bad.
“When it was all done, he told me I
was a good patient. Did he tell you the
same?”
“No! What the hell did you do that
made you a good patient? I was a good
patient. I didn’t kick or scream; I was
a good patient.”
“I’m sure you were; I wouldn’t let it
bother you. I’m just a better patient
than you are.”
“Oh bull. How are you a better patient? He was just probably in a good mood, being
Friday and all. I got him at the
beginning of the week, you got him on Friday.”
“Yeah, that’s probably it.
Oh, I have to stop at CVS to fill the
prescription.”
“You won’t need it, the pain wasn’t
that bad, and you have that high threshold thing. I never even filled my prescription.”
“What was your prescription for?”
“Tylenol 3, so you know the pain shouldn’t
be that bad.”
“Oh…Tylenol 3…I think I’ll get mine
filled, you know…just in case.”
“We have Tylenol at home. If you need it you can just take a little
extra of the over-the-counter stuff.”
“No, I’m going to get this filled.”
“Why?
What did he prescribe?”
“Ah…er…Vicodin.”
“Vicodin! That’s the good stuff. I only got Tylenol 3!”
“Well, I am the good patient.”
Glad it was not the painful, but your description of the shot made me cringe. I may need a trip to the medicine cabinet now as well.
ReplyDeleteYeah, you got gypped. Tylenol 3 is, I swear, just a placebo. You should swap prescriptions with her. Get well soon.
ReplyDeleteS
Extraction is a great solution in my book. But I was never a good patient. Didn't need any pain stuff but still a lousy patient.
ReplyDeleteIs your doctor male? That could be why Mrs. Cranky is the preferred patient....
ReplyDeleteAlso that's BS, I would have gone back and demanded vicodin.
xo
Do you and your wife do this often? I'm thinking you do and it's funny as heck.
ReplyDeleteHave a terrific day. ☺
Our dentist always refers to Mrs. Chatterbox as a good patient even though she requires a sedative shortly after entering the dental office, before the dentist even looks in her mouth. She was an Army brat and has lots of Army dentist horror stories to tell.
ReplyDeletelaughing!
ReplyDeletemy old mare had a tooth extracted last friday. dreadful process. sedation to keep her drowsy, no pain killer, mouth jacked open, fist jammed inside, wiggling loose tooth over and over, pliers, more wiggling, lots of blood. finally just some antibiotics to 'hopefully' prevent infection. my least favorite thing about horse care. worse than the gelding's sheath cleaning. :)
You say you were a good patient, but maybe the dentist didn't like the expression on your face. I know from experience that dentists can feel nervous if you scowl or grimace at them.
ReplyDeleteHers obviously was much more serious, and she was very good about going through it. Case closed.
ReplyDeleteSorry but he really did like her better. She got the good stuff. Proof positive.
ReplyDeleteAfter I had an extraction a few years ago, my dentist didn't call me a "good patient." However, when I returned for the follow-up visit, she was impressed with how quickly I had healed. She called me a "good healer."
ReplyDeleteAnd after reading TexWis Girl's comment, I'm glad I'm not a horse!
I have to go to a kid's dentist and get nitrous oxide out of a big clown. Yep. Give me a clown any day over a dentist. The good thing about the nitrous is that it stops working as soon as you stop inhaling it. The better thing is that you don't really care what the dentist does to you while you're inhaling it.
ReplyDeleteI am a huge fan of nitrous oxide. Used to do whip-its behind the ice cream stand. I might have a problem...
ReplyDeleteHer tooth was probably impacted and that put her non kicking and screaming into the category of the good patient. And the good meds. ;)
ReplyDeleteI had a tooth our a few months ago (after running away from the dentist twice - once after I'd actually had the anesthetic!) - apart from that I was a brilliant patient!
ReplyDeleteSometimes it doesn't pay to be the good patient; you don't get the good drugs. I laughed out loud at Mrs C's wanting to be the better patient - so funny. Board games night at your house must be interesting! :)
ReplyDelete