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Wednesday, September 25, 2013



I just watched a clip of a young professional baseball player throwing an in-the-dugout tantrum after a bad pitching outing.  It made me think of Tiger Woods and his little immature outbursts every time he doesn’t hit a perfect shot or make every putt.  There is no excuse for these silly outbursts.  As professionals, these cretins should learn how to deal with failure as much as they accept their successes.

Then I remember the young Cranky.  The young Cranky was not always a lot of fun on the golf course. 

It was not unusual for the young Cranky to throw a golf club after a bad shot.  I broke more than a couple of shafts banging the club head into the turf and threw many a ball into a water hazard in disgust…

And I sucked!! 

I had very little expectation of success and yet I could not handle failure.

I don’t think my brothers were much better.  We used to refer to it as the “Hagy Disease.”  We were never bad sports in team events, but in individual endeavors my family has a propensity for emotional outbursts.

My oldest brother, Jim, was not a club thrower, but he could be verbally abusive toward himself on a golf course.  I seem to recall my brother Chris being a pretty good club thrower though no one could throw a club as far and as straight as the young Cranky.

If you watch a TV golf match today, someone always yells out after every drive, “Baba Booey,” “mashed potatoes,” “you da man,” or “get in the hole.”  In my family, the after drive-yell was always “dammit.”

“Dammit Jim!”

“Dammit Chris!”

“Dammit Joe!”

This yell was often followed by a club thrown further than the ball was hit.

I am pleased to announce, as I realize how dumb these outbursts are, that I have not thrown a golf club in years. 

I have not seen my brother throw a club or show any real sign of frustration other than the “dammit Chris,” since I don’t know when. 

I believe Jim quit the game in favor of sailing where I am quite sure he never lost his temper.  I did hear him once say “Oh shit,” but that was when he realized the boat sprung a serious leak through the propeller shaft.  He then went on to calmly remedy the problem and kept the boat afloat.

I wonder, is it maturity, or is it just when you lose the exuberance of youth, you gain the realization that greatness has escaped you and there is no reason for self-flagellation?

I guess you realize that you are what you are.

Of course some people never gain that level of maturity (see Geezer Golf )

I am just glam glade glsd “DAMMIT JOE!” glad that I am no longer afflicted with this desease disese “SHIT!” disease of immaturity.



Friggin stupid keyboard! 


  1. I have keybora... keyboard problems, too... along with the issues with my left hand.

  2. Hmmm....and all this time I've been blaming my Tourettes. ;)


  3. Heh heh! Even Captain Kirk's doctor McCoy yelled at him that way.

  4. 'you gain the realization that greatness has escaped you and there is no reason for self-flagellation' - boy, ain't that the truth! that's what mellowing is really all about. :)

  5. I bet you felt so much better after throwing that club!

  6. Maybe you should quit golf and take up the boomerang. When you throw it it will come back to you, if you practice long and hard--in which case you might as well stick with golf.

  7. Years ago, I played a ton of golf and had a pretty low handicap. I played with a Japanese guy named Mr. Goto on Prince Edward Island. He had a handicap of one stroke better than me.

    We played neck and neck until the 17th hole. He hit a drive that veered left into the rough. I slammed what I thought was the best drive of my life, right down the middle of the fairway. However, my ball hit a sprinkler head and flew to the right into the woods, out of bounds. I lost the match by one stroke.

    As I carried on, moaning and complaining on the 18th green, Mr. Goto said to me, "Mr. JJ, you good play golp. Some thing beyond you control." I thought about it a while (paid him what I lost), then bought him dinner for the lesson.

    Those simple words had a lasting impact on me.

  8. surely you remember the tennis brats... Connors and McEnroe...

    You ever play frisbee golf? that would eliminate breakage as well as making tantrum throwing safer.

    I used to throw things but hated to clean up the mess. it is funny seriously that I would reach for something ... oh, noooo no the flashes of picking up the aftermath as well as I really liked what I was about to break were as quickly flashed in my mind as the anger and so I quit.

    I think that's maturity. I could be wrong.

  9. I can't get over kids bragging about how they got so mad they threw their phone, and it broke. They even hold it up to show the cracks, like it's a trophy or something.

    Immaturity. Not only for the young.

  10. I never saw Jim loose his temper...and he was married! Jus sayin!


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