STUPID HEADLINES 052613
It is time once again for:
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
|And if you MUST take poison, please take it responsibly!|
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments
One headline is completely made up. Guess the fake and win a mention.*
Thousands of French Households Taxed 100% - Well I guess they’ll just have to work a little harder!
'Toilet of the future' solves global issues – I think this was a misprint, should have been tissues.
Bacon restaurant shut down for smelling like bacon – Restaurant owner Kevin Bacon vows to shower more often.
More Americans Murdered In Mexico Than In Any Other Country In The World – Well yes, as technically Detroit is not a country.
Phil Jackson Once Dreamt About Spanking Kobe Bryant – It’s going to take a while to get that image out of my head.
Nepal slams climber's 'illegal' call from top of Mount Everest – Apparently it is illegal to yodel in Nepal.
FCC proposing to allow more sex and profanity during kids’ television viewing hours – Well, I guess since it is allowed on our streets, busses and trains, why not on TV?
Former Congressman Anthony Weiner announces bid for NYC mayor – Could we please have a law that people who text pictures of their penis to young girls cannot run for Mayor of the greatest city in the world!
|Ex-congressman Weiner doing his Eagle imitation.|
Scientist receives $100,000 Government Grant to determine if chicken or egg came first – Next will be a grant to determine why that chicken crossed the road.
Last week’s fake headlines:
Kosher Shrimp Co. Ferclempt Inc. third quarter comes up short, declares bankruptcy – Shrimp comes up short? Pleeze!
Dunkin Donuts sued for reverse discrimination – Apparently White Men can’t dunk.
TexWisGirl, Lo, and Val all guessed the Kosher Shrimp but did not get the Dunkin Donuts and therefore these bloggers:
TexWisGirl @ http://run-a-roundranch.blogspot.com/
Will not win a mention, and I will not suggest you visit their very entertaining posts!
Fran @ http://fishducky.blogspot.com/ knew that Shrimp are never kosher, but claimed all the other headlines were real based on some faulty Googling. Because of this error and because Googling for answers is strictly forbidden,
Has been disqualified and http://fishducky.blogspot.com/ will not be awarded a mention! Even though Fran's posts are also very entertaining and always good for several out loud gaffaws...PLEASE do not visit her site!!
*use of Google or other internet searches will disqualify any "Fake Headline" guesses!
HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY EVERYBODY!!
And thank you all that have sacrificed and served to keep us free!