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Sunday, December 11, 2011

HEADLINES 121111

HEADLINES 121111
It’s Sunday, time for Cranky’s least viewed post, HEADLINES of the week and my stupid sophomoric comments.  To induce comments, I will award a WHOOP-TEE-DOO to the best comment on the last headline.

Virginia Dog Missing for Eight Years Found in California – It took 8 years for Virginia owner to remember he lost the dog in California.

California Church Uses Baby Monitor to Nab Robbery Suspects- Pastor banged them over the head with the speaker and tied them up with the cords.

Obama Ambassador Under Fire For Blaming Israel For Muslim Anti-Semitism- “
If we could just get rid of Israel and all the Jews we could wipe out anti-Semitism completely!” Ambassador claims.

Pay Freeze for Queen in UK Austerity Measures – Even with the pay freeze, Elton is still one of the wealthiest men in the UK.

Mother of six trades in $96k house for used minivan – Says the van is much easier to parallel park!

Elderly complain about pants search at NY airport – Seniors don’t understand why they are forced to go through smiling TSA agents’ pockets.

FDA Cracking Down on Online Sperm Donor- There’s an APP for that?

Obama says jobless rate could drop to 8 percent – If only 1.6% would stop looking for jobs we could reach this lofty goal!

Woman Survives Being Buried Alive, Digs Herself Out With Engagement Ring – Sales of previously little known “Shovel Engagement Ring” go through the roof!

Muslim Cleric's Warning: Cucumbers Too Sexy for Women – Your comment here - best comment wins a WHOOP-TEE-DOO! ________________________________________________________________________

Last week’s comment contest on headline-

Flesh-eating banana fears hit Mozambique

Was won by

 One Bad Pixie  -  Viagra sales plummet!

 ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­OBP was the only entrant but nevertheless here it is:

WHOOP-TEE-DOO!

I almost forgot, Mr. and Mrs. Cranky are married one year today!!
WHOOP-TEE-DOO!!!

5 comments:

  1. Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. Cranky

    Cucumbers too sexy for women, but bananas are okay??

    First time I've read your headline comments and I'm a total fan ;)
    Susan
    http://75percenthippie.blogspot.com
    http://happyhippieheart.blogspot.com

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  2. I love all your headline comments :) I hope you never stop doing them.

    I would enter the context, but I can never come up with anything witty. Ever.
    Bring back the Toddler Talk. At least I had half a chance with that one :)

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  3. "Muslim women find themselves in a pickle and relish the long lost days when a woman could veg in peace."


    Excellent headlines!! Thank you for bringing a smile to my Sundays!!

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  4. Happy Anniversary!!!
    I forgot to say that the first time :)

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  5. Happy Anniversay Baby! I am the lady who coined the term prick lit!

    Here's one of my fave Elton jokes:

    Elton John is now writing his next song about himself...
    It's called 'Like a Gerbil in the Wind.'

    ReplyDelete