A Brand-New Car
There is a new car in the Cranky family. My Jeep was 11 years old and Mrs. C refused to drive it because it is a bit of a “rough ride” her opinion not mine, and it does not have cruise control, which I hate.
Anyway, time for a change.
The new car is a small Honda, not particularly exciting, but for some reason new cars have not excited people since the 50’s or 60’s when any new car on the block would bring all the neighbors out to gawk and drool. These days it is pretty hard to tell if a car is new or a 2011 model that just got detailed.
I was leaning to a small Cadillac, just to own a Cadillac, but decided it was not practical, would be a tight fit in my garage, and is kind of an old man car. I have enough old man stuff going on for me already.
As boring as a Honda might be, it is going to take me a few weeks to learn all its bells and whistles.
It has a back-up camera which I like because my head does not spin around like it used to, but there are three different camera settings…one would have been fine.
It has an audio system with am, fm, and satellite radio, plus a cd player and a few audio things that I have no idea what they are. There are several ways to access all these features, touch screen, buttons, and voice command. I am used to am/fm with a station dial and five preset stations. It took me three minutes to figure out my Jeep radio. This new technology will take me a few weeks even with help from Mrs. C.
A navigation system is nice, but I was just getting comfortable using SIRI on my phone. This system is twice as complicated with three times the options. I do not really like options.
The car beeps and yells out warnings for any approaching vehicle…I have to get used to the backseat driver that is in my control panel.
Setting the emergency brake and taking it off is tricky. The heating/air and fan operation is not just a simple switch and all the options are making my head spin. I miss “On” “Off” “High” “Low.”
The car requires no key to open the doors or start the engine. There is a “Fob” that when it is close to the car unlocks the door and when it is in the car allows the push of a button to start the car. This is great except:
I’ve read that thieves can boost the signal with some fancy electronic gadgets and unlock and even steal your car, even if your Fob is inside the house. Now I need to buy a Fob cover that blocks these signal amplifying instruments.
The other problem with keyless entry is I am never sure if the car is locked or not.
I can push a button to lock the doors, but when I go to check that the doors are in fact locked, they open because the Fob is too close. I am a bit OCD, and always check the doors just to confirm they are locked.
Confirming the door is locked reminds me of Garrison Keeler describing a parade where everyone wore hats that made up an American Flag when viewed from above. When the parade marchers passed a screen displaying the hat-formation flag, everyone looked up and the hat flag disappeared.
There are a few other new car things that will take me a while to master, hopefully I will catch on before I lose my extremely limited patience.
I do love new technology, but I also miss the simplicity of roll up windows, one speed wipers, keys, and on/off switches. I even miss that floor button to turn your high beams on or off, but that was replaced before Reagan was President.
It sounds terribly complicated, (satiate radio?), I think I'll stick with riding the bus or walking.ReplyDelete
I thought that might be it, but with all the new stuff these days, who could be sure?Delete
I find new cars are quite complicated so I am pleased I no longer drive. A friend has one of those fancy self-locking no-key things and it worries me to death when we have to leave it unattended when we go out to lunch. Happy driving with the Honda.ReplyDelete
I was drawn to your blog by its name, being a cranky old woman myself! Love it - it's making me laugh out loud as I look back over old posts! As for cars, I hate the things, as long as they get me from A to B, I'm happy. I too remember the beam button, here in the UK we called it the dip switch. I even remember those old indicators that flicked out the side of the car to show which way you intended to go - yes, I'm that old!ReplyDelete
Congratulations on the new car! Just remember, just because it has the features, it doesn't mean you have to use them. I've had my car three years, and still don't use the Bluetooth stuff because I'm perfectly happy without it.ReplyDelete
A few months ago transitioned from an old Chevy truck (or what was left of it) to my first vehicle made in 2000's. And '06 Honda. And let me just say, these engineers were connivingly idiotic. Sure, they threw in some really useful things other truck ain't got, but all the normal stuff just works oddly. For instance it has an automatic DRL (daytime running lights) setting that I use. But every time you open the door it still puts off the 'lights on' warning bell making you THINK something's amiss. Turn off the DRL, warning goes away. Almost makes you wanna turn off a safety feature. Odd.ReplyDelete
I agree! Those safety features are great, except that I am so conditioned to pump the brakes in an emergency stop instead of standing on the pedal and having the car pump for me that I have almost had several accidents thanks to those safety brakes...also I will never get out of the habit of turning my head to check for mirror blind spots (Daddy taught me well) and I really don't need those annoying warning beeps.Delete
I wish our truck would last forever because I really dread all the new stuff on them now. Good luck with yours.ReplyDelete
I hear you on all the tech stuff in new vehicles. My car is easy to know if it's locked or not. If it's locked the side mirrors are folded in. If it's unlocked they are out. I can have the fob and the car stays locked until I put my hand on the door handle. Took me a while to figure that out.ReplyDelete
Have a fabulous day and enjoy your new car, Joe. ☺
I know...I miss the simplicity of the good old days myself......on and off....what a remarkable concept that was.ReplyDelete
Thank you, you just talked me out a new car. Mine is 15 and you pretty much described it in your last paragraph cept for the light switch on the floor. However it runs like it is new and has NEVER had any down time except for routine maintenance. Hope I didn't just jinx it.ReplyDelete
Have fun with all the bells and whistles and don't let them distract you.
Many years ago, we had a car that talked. My husband thinks it was a ’69 or ’72 Buick. It would interrupt our conversation with things it considered important such as, "Your washer fluid is low." These pronouncements were usually greeted with an order of "Shut up, Harry!" from us. I think it would have been much more useful if we lived in the ghetto. Of course, it would have to change its accent--& its name. Imagine getting in the car, turning the key--& NOTHING! Then "Tyrone" offers an opinion: "I think some mothaf****r stole our batt'ry!"ReplyDelete
because my head does not spin around like it used to....... the same case with me, so I got sensors with beepers installed (instead of camera)ReplyDelete
My idea of a good car is that it has an engine that makes all four wheels go the same direction at the same time, an air conditioner, and a radio, and i’m willing to give on those last two. All the bells and whistles to me are just stuff that’s going to break and i’m going to have to pay a mint to fix it.ReplyDelete
Congrats on your new vehicle! Enjoy that new car smell.ReplyDelete
The Pony's Nissan Rogue has one of those fob thingies, and it freaks me out! Let the record show that his is not a luxury car, or all that new (2013). I still haven't mastered the radio in my Acadia, and we've had it almost three years.
Congratulations. New cars are always fun.ReplyDelete
I love new cars. Congratulations on yours! It's fun figuring out what everything does if you can remember it when you're in the middle of traffic which can be challenging depending on the vehicle but the smell of a new car and the feel of a new steering wheel. Good stuff. :)ReplyDelete
Spiffy on the new car! I love how its smell when its so new, if only it could stay that way without the benefit of an air freshener. Son got a Honda CRV a few months back. I liked that when he hooked his cell phone up to the Blue Tooth (or whatever he had to do) when he is driving and I text him I get an auto reply message that he's driving and he'll get back to me later. Good safety feature.ReplyDelete
My husband bought a new CRV a few months ago. I can't tell you how many times he has had trouble pressing the button to start the car. It gives me a mini heart attack each time, thinking the battery is dead. I don't know what his problem is; either he isn't pressing it hard enough or long enough or his foot isn't on the brake?ReplyDelete
My car is going on 11 years old, too. I just figured out three months ago how to make a radio station "pre-set" and how to make the window roll down all the way without holding the button down during the entire time.ReplyDelete
It'll be very interesting when it becomes time for a new car for me. Have fun with yours!