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Monday, August 15, 2011

INITIAL REACTION


INITIAL REACTION

 Little shit annoys me.  I know it shouldn’t, but it does.  That is why I am a cranky old man.  This one really frosts my morning coffee!
A recent study determined that people whose initials result in a positive image live 4.5 years longer than people whose initials have a negative connotation.  So Warren Oscar Williams can expect to outlive Betty Ann Davis by 4.5 years.

Who funded this?  How did they conduct this study?  Who cares?

Should everyone now make sure to name their children with positive initials so they live longer? 

Adolph Hitler had no middle name.  His initials were AH…asshole.  I’m kinda glad his initials did not add an extra 4.5 years to his life.

What constitutes a positive, negative or neutral connotation?  My initials are JPH.  ??? Is that neutral?  Will I live 2.25 years longer than Betty Ann Davis?  Do actuaries know about this initial crap? 

YES is a positive initial.  Will Yelbert Edward Shithead out live Nathanial O’grand?

There must be about a million variables in a study such as this.  Were genetics factored in?  Was gender a factor?  What is positive, what is negative?  Are initials ABG Ass Backwards Geek, or Able Bodied Gentleman? 

Do you think whoever ran this study had any preconceived ideas about what the results might be?  Was the study done in such a way that the results might be skewered to make the conclusion fit the hypothesis?  Hmmmm.

What is that you say?  “Come on Cranky, these studies are performed by respected intelligent honest scientists and academians.” 

REALLY?  If they are so freaking intelligent and honest and respected, then why aren’t they studying and solving problems that might actually make a difference in some body’s life?

Why do I care?  I’m just cranky. 

I should have never even read about a study that was conducted by someone named Donald Unger Michael Bates!

1 comment:

  1. I guess M1 is screwed. Her initials are RAT ;)

    When she was a baby, we'd put her bib on backwards and fly her around the room and call her RAT BABY!

    ReplyDelete

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