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Saturday, October 29, 2016

Stupid Headlines 103016

Stupid Headlines 103016
It is time again for
Wow, what are the serious crimes?
Stupid Headline Sunday
 This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
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Former pastor allegedly tried to choke baby in Wal-Mart – This happens at Wal-Mart all the time what makes it news is the guy was a “Former Pastor!”
Police smash windows of hot car to rescue child, find wig instead – The wig was sent to ER and was released the same day.  The wig is currently reported to be recovering and stable.
Dead or Alive singer, dies at 57 – No comment.
Tiger Woods Doesn't Regret Cheating On His Ex-Wife Elin Nordegren – He is a bit pissed off that he got caught.
Couple ties knot in the nude after bride survives rare flesh-eating bacteria – I’m not sure what any of this has to do with getting married in the nude.  
WARNING, DO NOT ENLARGE UNLESS YOU HAVE EYE BLEACH HANDY
Giant inflatable Christmas tree faces protests because it looks like a sex toy – Who are these perverts that can see a sex toy out of an inflatable tree? (I just checked it out, it is a little butt-pluggish…whatever that is.)

NY Times reports on 7-year-old's scary dream about Trump – I was sure this was a gag, but sadly it is true.  Now I am voting for Hillary so a 7-year-old won’t have scary dreams.  I wonder are the dreams Trump’s fault, or perhaps the result of overzealous wack-a-doodle parents talking politics in front of and scaring the crap out of their child?

Strangers fall in love after organ donation – Is that what they’re calling it these days?
Clinton's State Department spent $5.4 million on 'crystal stemware' – Hmmm…isn’t Crystal Stemware a porn star?
Man sought for stealing Torah scrolls valued at $200K from synagogue – Maybe 200K to the synagogue, but I think he is going to have a pretty tough time fencing these or putting them on EBay.
California regulates cow farts – I predict a shortage of Beano.
AND THE FEEL-GOOD HEADLINE OF THE WEEK:
NYC firefighter stages dramatic rescue in fatal blaze - As roaring flames consumed an apartment building in New York City early Thursday, a firefighter dangling from a rope plucked a trapped person from a window on the fifth floor and safely lowered him to the ground.  The rope that colleagues had used to drop him from the roof burned through just 15 seconds after he touched the earth.
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Come back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINES
(and maybe a nice one or two)

14 comments:

  1. haha have a wonderful days ahead Joe

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  2. The police who rescued the wig remind me of the ones who busted up a car window to confiscate a "gun" on a college campus and found a wooden replica used by a museum curator. Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!

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  3. the last one gave me chills as i read the last line. thanks for the feel of a miracle. :)

    the wig and the trump dream i truly expected to be linked...

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  4. No matter what goes on at Wal Mart, firefighters always seem to be the ones who balance it all out! I saw that video on tv and it was amazing!

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  5. I didn't pay attention and now I am hunting eye bleach. Mercy, who was marrying what?
    I saw that firefighter video also on TV and it made my day.

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  6. I'll stick with the firefighter story this week. I've had way too much awful political talk this week. I'm so sick of it.

    I linked this post to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day Joe. ☺

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  7. "Hmmm…isn’t Crystal Stemware a porn star?" If it were $5.4M might not seem so out of reason (said Donald Trump).

    Hahaha! :)

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  8. I guess it all depends on which organ is being donated, and where.

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  9. That first one up top is the best. It's weird enough that I am probably going to need to run some searches.

    So any laughs this post gave me (and I did laugh) are going to be ruined by the hour I'm going to spend trying and failing to track down the real story there...

    Oh well...

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  10. Loved your headlines (& comments), as always!!

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  11. Even my 13-year-old self won't click on that picture! The term "flesh-eating" has a lot to do with that decision.

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  12. Forget about the 7 year old having a scary dream about Trump. I am having a nightmare that Trump or Clinton is going to be the next president.

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  13. I just about spit out my coffee at your comment re 'organ donation'. . .

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