Stupid Headlines 062616
It is time again for
|That's just wrong!|
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
Microsoft is testing a new mosquito trap to fight Zika – Makes sense, my computer runs on Microsoft Windows, and it catches bugs all the time.
Axe-throwing club wants a liquor license – Cause axe-throwing and liquor go together like blow torches and dynamite.
Texas woman wakes up with British accent after common jaw surgery – Apparently the surgery also included a stiff upper lip.
Same-sex marriages in US up, domestic partnerships down – Well they have only recently been deemed legal, so why is this a surprise. I’ll bet sales of Cuban cigars will also be up this year.
Movement on a vast scale detected near San Andreas fault – Maybe Oprah shouldn’t eat bread every day!
Judge rules Texas prison must provide inmates with safe-drinking water – I’m not I favor of mollycoddling prisoners, but I think providing non-poisonous water is reasonable.
Clinton IT specialist invokes 5th more than 125 times – Big deal, I used to take a fifth every night…now I just have an occasional glass of wine.
Solar-powered plane lands in Spain – The plane in Spain landed mainly cause it rained.
Bank employees publicly spanked for poor performance – Hmmm, I think I’d prefer to just give my notice by kicking this shithead boss’s ass.
Despite Latino surge, Asians remain U.S.'s fastest growing racial group – Coming around the final turn its Asians followed by Latinos with the Middle-east driving hard, and Latinos are surging; coming to the finish its Asians…Latinos…Asians and at the finish it’s ASIANS!!
Serbia Asks People To Please Stop Throwing Their Grenades In The Garbage – Or at least duck tape the pin. (Thank you Fran)
Woman Calls Police Over Not Enough Cheese On Her Pizza – If you think this is a problem, you should be a Garbage man in Serbia! (Thanks Marty)
Come back next week for more