Stupid Headlines 093012
Sunday is time for Cranky’s readers least favorite post, "Stupid Headlines" for the week and my stupider, sophomoric and often offensive comments.
I swear I was never on Pine Street...I was home...ah...watching TV
NYC schools to dispense morning-after pill without notifying parents – I wish they had those when I went to school…one more chance after a bad test right?
Why rough sea-slug sex is good – Your comments on this one are welcome…come on Lowandslow, I dare you!
A man mauled by a 400-pound tiger at the Bronx Zoo has been charged with criminal trespass. - Well that and having his arm ripped off might just keep him from jumping in with a tiger again.
Kids keep 2-headed snake as pet – It has to be asked, “How do it poop?”
Distance between Earth and sun redefined – Now that is going to change EVERYTHING!! Do they measure from Mt. Everest or from Death Valley?
Rapist seeking visitation with child he fathered after attack on teen victim – What the frig? Of course in Iran the teen would be stoned to death as a slut so…we may be stupid as hell but at least were civilized.
Ahmadinejad addresses U.N. General Assembly amid protests –
“Before I start, can I grub a smoke from anyone?”
Alaska woman falls off 60-foot cliff while texting – PEOPLE!!! PLEASE…Do NOT text and walk!! (She survived; it’s OK to laugh your ass off.)
Scientists find way to make old muscles young again-
Scientists face four years in prison for failing to predict earthquake – If it was me I’d start off every day with “The Earth is round with a chance of shaking.”