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Wednesday, September 5, 2012
I WANTED ONE!!
I wanted the convenience of filtered water at the touch of the button. I wanted the convenience of crushed ice at the touch of a button. This would be perfect for a scotch-on-the-rocks, my favorite beverage.
I WANTED THIS APPLIANCE!!
I am 66 years old; I deserve convenient filtered water without one of those ugly contraptions screwed to the kitchen faucet. I deserve ice without filling and freezing those plastic trays. My kids can just scratch $1000 off their inheritance…I was going to get one…damn it!!
Mrs. Cranky and I went shopping for a new modern refrigerator-freezer. The model we wanted was two inches too large for the cabinet opening that was in our kitchen.
Hmmm. Screw it; if we have to move cabinets around, I hate the ones we have, let’s just get all new cabinets.
Hmmm. We can’t put in all new cabinets and save the current counter tops. Screw it; I hate our current counter tops; let’s just get all new counter tops.
Hmmm. The new counter tops and cabinets will clash with our current tile floor. Screw it; I hate that old tile; let’s just get an all new tile floor.
Hmmm. As long as we are getting new counters and we have to get a new sink, I would like a garbage disposal, the walls will need repainting, the stove will look out of place and the kitchen overhead light will need to be updated. Screw it; let’s just do it all.
You know…as long as we are doing all that and we have the workers here and everything will be a mess; the downstairs bathroom really needs a new vanity, tile, sink toilet and mirror.
I do not want to even think about how much getting instant crushed ice for my scotch-on-the-rocks is going to cost me. It’s worth it, I deserve it, and I’m getting it!!
Since we started thinking about this project a year ago, I have quit drinking. Doesn’t matter, when we’re done I won’t be able to afford scotch anyway.
If you are in the area, stop by for a scotch-on-the-rocks.
You’ll have to bring the scotch, but I’ll have plenty of ice.