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Tuesday, September 23, 2014

FOUR WEDDINGS


FOUR WEDDINGS
 
Mrs. Cranky and I spend much of our lives in bed watching TV while also reading or playing games on our laptops. 

Don’t judge, it works for us.

One of the shows that we often watch is “Four Weddings.”  It is part of Mrs. C’s attempt to turn me gay.  I always thought that is something that you are just born with, but I might be wrong as I am beginning to like this show.

Actually I like the show as it gives me a chance to bash the women who are so incredibly picky and judgmental.

The show is a competition where four brides rate each other’s weddings.  The bride with the best wedding gets a free honeymoon on a beautiful island.  The best part of the show is listening to each bride’s critique of the other’s ceremony.

“I give Teresa’s wedding a 6.  I loved her gown, but there weren’t enough flowers in the church.  The food was ok, but the steak was too rare and my fork had water stains.

“I gave Marsha’s wedding a 4.  The wedding vows were beautiful, but the priest was kinda short.  I was not a big fan of her a-line dress, the DJ was hard to hear and my shoes were too tight.

“I rated Mary’s wedding a 7.  The ceremony on the beach was beautiful, though there was too much sand.  The cocktail party was really nice and I loved the special Weddingtini’s.  I don’t remember anything else.

“I have to give Sally’s wedding a two.  The church was too warm, her dress was too white, her husband was bald, the music too loud, the food too cold, the ceremony was too long, and the date was at the wrong time of the month.”

Just once I would like to see the same show with the grooms ranking each wedding.

“I give Vinnies wedding a 9.  The ceremony was short, the liquor was free and the bridesmaids were hot!”

“I give Ron’s wedding a 9.  The liquor was free, the food was warm, and the bridesmaids were hot!”

“I give Franks wedding an 8.  I missed the ceremony, the liquor was free, the food was warm, but one of the bridesmaids told me to go jump in a lake.”

“I gave Johnny’s wedding a ten.  I don’t know I just liked it.”

Hmmm…maybe that show would not be very interesting.

16 comments:

  1. never watched it. people's fascinations with weddings - not marriages - boggles my mind.

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  2. I've never watched that show but love your post about it. Hilarious! And reading the guys point of view of the show reminds that guys are the most simpler gender. Like Ron's answer. The food was free and the liquor was free. Spot on!

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  3. I'd go for the free booze. Not a big fan of weddings. Just not my thing.

    Cranky, are you gay? Bwahahahahahaha.

    Have a fabulous day. My best to Mrs. Cranky. ☺

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  4. I've never seen more than five seconds of a reality show, and that in channel flipping. I wonder how people can be so mean.

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  5. Like Tex, I'm amazed at how many wedding-oriented shows there are on TV. Frank's sisters would watch one of them .. not sure which one.. at their cottage most days. I guess they were reruns. I couldn't get over how incredibly spoiled and bitchy the women were. I just don't get it. But your post is hilarious. And probably pretty spot-on.

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  6. I watch that show a lot--& I agree!!

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  7. I am anti-reality TV! In fact, I blame reality TV and Nickleback for 90% of the world's problems.

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  8. I would never watch the show but loved your critique. It took two minutes to read, that is about long enough. Funny about the guy version.

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  9. I refuse to admit that I've watched this show. But I do like the fact that the bride with the biggest budget doesn't always win. S*#T! I've said too much.

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  10. I have never watched this show. I don't think we get it on our cable.

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  11. This is just one of many shows that I don't watch. All of those "reality" shows don't get even a minute on my screen.

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  12. Never heard of the show, but I think your version would be a definite smash hit.

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  13. I've seen it once or twice. It's addictive. I could probably even get my husband to sit through a whole episode, if I included some chips, dip, and potato skins.

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  14. Queenie and eldest daughter LOVE that show. Sometimes me too, reminds me how stupid and useless some lives are compared to mine.

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  15. Never saw the show, but now I know all I need to know. I hate to admit this, but it sounds a little like our conversations after we leave a wedding. "The minister was too theatrical, the groom's parents showed up an hour late in jeans, someone broke into the dressing room and stole all the bridal party's purses, and I never like red dresses on the bridesmaids."

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