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Thursday, April 24, 2014

DON’T COVER IT


DON’T COVER IT
 
I don’t understand women and their obsession with keeping things perfect.  Back in the day, women would cover new furniture with plastic slip covers.  That old couch would be as good as new under the plastic, but it looked like crap and was weird as hell to sit on over the plastic.

At some point women learned the error of their plastic slip cover ways. I don’t think anyone would invest in the slip cover industry today, but that old “slip cover” instinct is still alive, at least for Mrs. Cranky.

Every new electronic device today comes with a thin film of plastic to protect that device from being scratched before it is sold.  Mrs. Cranky insists on not removing this plastic film in order to continue the scratch protection.

This drives me crazy.  In a short period of time this invisible film becomes very visible.  Air bubbles develop which makes the film more distracting than any scratch could possibly be.  The edges of the film start to peel and just scream, “Rip me off!”

“Can I just rip that crap off, it is driving me crazy?”

“No, it protects the cover from ugly scratches.”

“But the protective cover that guards against ugly scratches is ugly!”

“It is scratch free underneath, leave it alone.”

We are caught in an OCD hell.  That bubbled film is like flaking skin after a sun burn.  It is just screams to me, “Tear me the frig off!”  Mrs. C’s OCD sees only the pristine plastic under the film and it screams to her, “Don’t touch me!”

I lose this battle every time.  Once the film is off there is no turning back and when the underneath subsequently gets that inevitable scratch I would never hear the end of it.  I am forced to endure the ugly bubbled-up, starting-to-peel protective film on every DVD and CD player, every cable box and every electronic control panel in the house.

Maybe someday, the protective film will go the way of plastic slip covers.  I would like to see manufacturers sell their products with built in scratches instead of that ugly protective film.  Hell they could even advertise it:

“Our new control panel comes already scratched for your convenience so there is no need for ugly bubbled up protective film!”

I’d buy it, and I look forward to that day.  In the meantime I will just have to buck up and fight off that film tearing urge.

Maybe if I can fight the tearing urge, this summer I can leave that sunburned dead skin unpeeled.  Mrs. Cranky hates that.  I know it will drive her up the wall.

“Will you just rip that ugly dead skin off!”

“What, and let that new skin underneath get scratched?  I don’t think so.”

“Jerk!” 

27 comments:

  1. Ummm, Joe....you need to introduce her to the magic of "screen savers". They're available aftermarket for just a few bucks for a package of 2. And if your darlin' iPhone/iPad/Android, screen saver should get scratched or otherwise yucky, it can be removed and a new one put in place in seconds. Whoa! :)

    S

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  2. I once knew a family that had a living room that no one was allowed to enter! I thought it was hilarious, but the kids were dead-serious: That room was reserved for adults...

    Pearl

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    1. Pearl- we had some former 'best friends' who had such a place for ONLY special occasions. By the time we 'broke up' with them many years later they had used that room just once when the family room was being painted.

      They also had a second dining room for similar reasons. Same story.

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  3. laughing. :)

    i've been guilty of leaving the plastic pieces on things like cell phones - until they eventually drive me crazy. and speaking of protecting cell phones, the cover you have to BUY to protect your smart phone needs to be easier to adhere without air bubbles and spaces you end up having to squeeze, pinprick out! ugh!

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  4. I rip off that thin film of plastic. They I rip off my cuticles.

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  5. I can understand the inclination, however, as son as the protective covering is visible it should, in my humble opinion come off!

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  6. I'm with you. I hate the plastic. Knocking wood furiously... I took the plastic off my iPhone & refused to put the screen protector. I have an old iPhone 4 and so far so good...

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  7. FYI... I try to comment on EVERYTHING sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't... glad today's went through. Have a good one! :)

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  8. I am guilty of covering electronics and things that cannot be wiped LOL. I am with Mrs C. here.

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    1. Can't be wiped?? I clean my stuff on a regular basis with LCD screen cleaner or a smidge of windex. Not wet, just barely damp so it dries immediately.

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  9. Here's what you need to do. The next time she's not looking take the plastic cover off everything. Everything. What's she going to do but make your life miserable for a few days or weeks.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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    Replies
    1. That is not going to happen...dang do I look that stupid?

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  10. I'm snickering at the comments as much as the post. It would drive me nuts to see, smudgy, peeling, scratched plastic on everything like that. The curled up edges collect dust and pet hair. It's far less durable than what it's "protecting." Sorry Mrs. Cranky... you're usually right in these little debates. ;)

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  11. I seem to do all the "unwrapping" around here, so there's never an issue about leaving on that protective layer. I've never understood the idea of covering up the living room furniture. Sure it'll keep it looking nice, but who cares? It'll still be out of style and crappy looking in twenty years anyway.

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  12. If I buy it said plastic is gone before it enters our house. If she buys it, her abridged version of Mrs Cranky's rules apply. It works for us.

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  13. Heh, heh. I think getting a nasty, scruffy sunburn would be worth it just so you could turn the tables on Mrs. C.

    My new laptop came with the plastic cover. Left it on for a couple of weeks just to preserve the newness. The moment the cover was off a heavy object fell off a shelf and scratched the cover. (fortunately didn't crack the screen). My laptop is easily identifiable now.

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  14. I'm with Mrs. Cranky on this one: I have many things with protective plastic on them. I also have lots of price tags dangling from things.

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  15. You're right; they jut need to come with that fine patina of age.

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  16. Off with the head...I mean, the plastic!

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  17. Those appliances need that plastic ripped off FAST, like a Band-Aid, so the area underneath can be allowed to breathe.

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  18. Ha, fortunately for me, the kids destroy things cover and all here.

    I can remember my grandparents have a formal living room with covers on all the furniture. I always thought what is the point if no one is allowed to ever sit on them.

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  19. Some are obsessed by the "covering up"
    I just understand people who carry on with the plastic cover on the car seats. "How can you sit on plastic?" I ask them. They say "just hold on for some more time, we are getting new covers"

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  20. I like your thinking but I'm pretty sure you won't be able to leave that sunburned peeling skin alone.
    My digital camera, when it was new, had such a perfect film over the screen, I didn't realise it was there, until a corner lifted when the camera was almost a year old.
    I would hate sitting on a plastic covered couch. my mum used to make slip covers, but in fabric to suit the seasons, so the covers were changed and washed a couple of times a year.

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  21. I share your aversion to the ugly plastic scratch covering on everything electronic these days! It drives MY OCD nuts when people leave it on...

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  22. I rip off that plastic as soon as I get the thing home. I totally agree with Joe on this one!

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