STUPID HEADLINES 041314
It is time once again for
Ya think?
Headline courtesy of Fraternity brother "Squeak"
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
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This week’s stupid
headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.
One headline is completely made up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-do.
One headline is completely made up, guess the fake and win a mention and a Whoop-tee-do.
9-month-old
booked on attempted murder charge – Baby was wearing an “Osh Gosh by Gosh” onesie with a
hoodie and was holding a bag of skittles so…
Doctors successfully implant lab-grown vaginas – My mind boggles at the possibilities.
Doctors successfully implant lab-grown vaginas – My mind boggles at the possibilities.
BMW Blocks Hydrant, Boston
Firefighters Go Right Through It – I hate to keep picking on BMW drivers and how their S**t don’t
stink, but way to go BFD!
Podiatrist claims foot pain from high
heels can be relieved through breast massage – I am going to take a wild guess that
his specialty is high heel foot pain.
Charges reduced for mom who allegedly drove
SUV filled with kids into ocean – Charge is dropped from attempted murder to DWU…driving
while under water.
Man Who Peed In Co-worker's Coffee Ordered To Pay $5K – Next time try the toilet…it’s free!
Oscar Pistorius
accused of invention, lies in third day of cross-examination – Olympian accused of murder
does not have a…does not have a…I’m sorry, even I can’t do it…it’s just too
easy.
Judge
rules flashing headlights is free speech in Oregon case – Wait…are we talking cars here, cause that other thing is kinda involuntary
and clearly is free speech.
JPMorgan loses money every time it makes a mortgage – I need to double check my old Eco 101 text
book, I’m pretty sure that is a bad formula for any bank.
Lisa Vanderpump's Husband Sued Over
Alleged Bar Brawl – Beverly
Hills Housewife tough guy husband put down his sissy dog and attempted to Gay
Slap construction worker on the arm…ooh scary!**
**See
*
For winners of the last Stupid Headline contest http://joeh-crankyoldman.blogspot.com/2014/04/contest-winners.html
i am at a loss as to a pick, so i'll go with lab-grown...
ReplyDeleteI've gotta go with the 9 month old - though it just seems too easy. As always, they were all great. Thank you for the fun laughs this morning! :D
ReplyDeleteI'll go with the SUV as I know of no charge of driving while under water.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous Silly Sunday. :)
I'll go with the vicious 9-month-old killer.
ReplyDeleteAnd now I learned my high school guidance counselor gave me ANOTHER bum steer? Besides missing out on becoming a Brazilian bikini wax specialist I also missed out on being a spike-heel podiatrist? DOH!
S
How in the heck do you find these things? Your comments are a hoot. I have heard a few of them. I'm going to go with the podiatrist. He'd deserve to be .. ummm.. busted!
ReplyDeleteI've heard of a few of them, too. Several others sound made up...it's really difficult to decide. I think I'll go with JPMorgan losing money on mortgages. No bank would really ever lose money over something, would it?
ReplyDeleteI read about most of these but I don't recall tithe one about the podiatrist so I 'll pick that one.
ReplyDeleteI'm gonna go with the podiatrist also. I heard the baby thing on the radio the other day. Stupid! Seriously
ReplyDeleteI think it is about J P Morgan.
ReplyDeleteI've gotta go with JPMorgan as fake. How else are they making money...through some clandestine breast-massage-certification business that caters to podiatrists?
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure on the headlines. My TV time has been reduced and is limited to catching the weather. I do hope that the false headline is not the one about the podiatrist though!
ReplyDelete