YOU’RE SO VAIN
You walked into the bedroom, thinking
you were so hot
Your eyebrow strategically raised up
high
Acting just like I don’t know what
You had one eye on my computer as you
watched me typing my post
And then you complain I make you look
foolish, make you look foolish
You’re so vain you probably think this
blog is about you
You’re so vain I bet you think this
blog is about you
Don’t you don’t you
Mrs. Cranky
thinks I pick on her in some of my posts.
When I start to type, she asks “What
are you saying about me now?”
I refuse to
tell her. If she wants to know what I’m writing,
she should subscribe to my blog. She
will not. The only time she reads my
posts are when she peeks over my shoulder and sees me type “Mrs. Cranky.”
“What are you saying now? Making fun of me again? Is that how you
impress all your on-line girl-friends…making me look stupid? Do they know you
are a jerk?”
“First of all, they are just other bloggers;
they are not on-line girl- friends.
Second of all, I don’t make fun of you and from the comments I get
everyone loves Mrs. Cranky. Thirdly, if they read this blog, yes, they know I’m
a jerk. And this post isn’t even about you;
it’s about the coming snow storm!” (Well it is about you now.)
“I just want to know when you post
about me so I can comment a rebuttal.”
“What do you care? No one who reads this knows you anyway. So what if I sometimes exaggerate a little?”
“A little! You make me look like an idiot who curses
like a sailor!”
“Well you do speak a little roughly
from time to time, and sometimes when A=b and b=c, your A doesn’t =c.”
“You exaggerate!”
“I blog because I love!”
“JERK!”
I think Mrs.
Cranky is just a little bit vain.
Carly Simon would love this. I think Mrs. C is the best. Tell her I said that. She's married to you, she has to be good.
ReplyDeleteDude. I feel your pain. I learned a long time ago to keep the blog ONLY ABOUT ME. Sounds self centred, or something, but I dare not go "out there". Good luck.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, Mrs. C HAS to be some sort of saint. Just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteMrs. Cranky sounds pretty funny to me, but I just met her. I have a potty mouth off-blog.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a healthy marriage to me.
ReplyDeletelove the opening 'song'. :) mrs. c - we love you!
ReplyDeletethanks for all the nice comments. he is a jerk but he's my jerk so i'll just have to put up with an occasional blog about me. (just so he can get you all to laugh). enjoy the snow, stay warm & have a happy valentine's day
ReplyDeleteIt has been some hours since my post, but I had to come back. Thanks for the earworm. You're so vain has been rambling around my head for hours.
ReplyDeletethat's ok, we all know you're a jerk too ..... it all balances out
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, Mrs. C. I like his blog, and I enjoy blogging with him, but I wouldn't be his girlfriend even if he begged!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Bob: She must be a Saint, 'cause she puts up with you. ;)
ReplyDeleteI love to hear about Mrs. C. Especially when she makes a perfectly reasonable request, like for a small glass of orange juice, and you don't understand what she wants.
ReplyDeleteNo offense, but I already have one man. WHY would I want another one? You're safe from my clutches.
What's good for the gander is good for the goose. You tell us about her A plus B's, and she gets right to the source and just tells you.
ReplyDeleteTell Mrs. Cranky to start a blog...then you can compare followers and number of comments.
ReplyDeleteAnd curse words.
Not only does it take a brave man to blog about his spouse, but also one who is rock solid about the love between them and knows she will forgive him for slight exaggeration in the name of entertaining his girlfriends, errr, I mean the troops! :-))
ReplyDeleteI agree with everything they all said above me there^.
ReplyDeleteYou got me singing again. (Actually, this time it's in my head because I don't want the family to hear me from the other room and to think I'm losing it.)
ReplyDeleteMrs. Cranky gives you the best blogging material. Make sure you thank her appropriately.