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Wednesday, October 2, 2013

The Logic Train Doesn’t Stop at the Water Heater

The Logic Train Doesn’t Stop at the Water Heater
Mrs. Cranky sometimes has some strange ideas.  Sometimes these ideas defy logic.  Sometimes I try and understand her.  Sometimes I am a jerk.

This morning was a cold day for September.  There was a chill in the old townhouse.  Mrs. C asked me,

“Could you go down to the basement and turn up the dial on the hot water heater?”

“Ah…ok…but why?”

“It’s so cold, I want hot water for my shower.”

“But the heater will heat the water to the same temperature regardless of what the outside temperature is.”

“Maybe, but not as fast, and I want hotter water on a cold day.”

“Well just turn up the nob in the shower, it is never on maximum.”

“I want the nob on twelve o’clock, not nine.”

It was at this point that I knew I was not going to get anywhere in this discussion. 

The logic-train does not stop at the water heater. 

I plodded on anyway.

“If the water temperature was to your satisfaction yesterday, it will be just as warm today.  If you turn the heater up, it will just provide the potential for a higher temperature, and it will really not heat up any faster.”

This comment was followed by a dissertation which talked of open doors, cold tile, steam, nozzle settings, and nob-clock positions none of which made any sense to me.  However, Cranky is getting smarter.  I nodded my head and went downstairs to turn up the hot water heater.

When I returned I just said,

“Sorry, I’m a jerk!”


  1. The thermostat works that way, too...
    ...creates pointless arguments, I mean.
    Worse, more people have access.

  2. Definitely a Venus/Mars thing. Funny thing is you weren't a 'jerk' -- i.e. until you said you were ... ;-)

  3. A "hot water heater"? Why does hot water need heating? Ask her that. (Then run.) ;)


  4. That just cracked me up. I would definitely be on Mrs. Cranky's side on this one. Jim has totally given up trying logic with me on anything mechanical.

  5. Sorry, I'm with Mrs. C... When it's cold, I want to know that the water prepared for me in the water heater is at least 20 degrees hotter. I don't want to wait for the hot water to get hotter by turning down the cold. I want it NOW! :) You've been around us women folk long enough... Have the words Yes Dear, without question, left you? :)

  6. I see you had an "Aha!!" moment!!

  7. No logic. It just feels better.

  8. I just tell Mrs. Chatterbox, "I will," to whatever she asks and many of these things just don 't get done. One of the few things we argue about is the thermostat, even though she's the only one who fools around with it.

  9. I have a Mrs. C sister-in-law. I love her. She once cleaned my brother's records with vodka (wipe lightly with alcohol). She once was not electrocuted because of her gold jewelry. She saw a bad string of Christmas tree lights and cut through the cord with scissors (so no one would be hurt by them). She woke up on the floor on the other side of the room. Parts of her bracelet and necklace were melted together.

  10. I have to pipe up here.
    Dude! Just run downstairs. Stand around for a few minutes, scratch whatever needs to be scratched, go back upstairs and announce that you have indeed "turned up the water heater".
    NOBODY (including Mrs. Cranky) will ever notice either way.
    It's like "Theater of the Mind", you know?

  11. You could have avoided all of that, by just saying "yes dear," and then going down and pretending to turn up the water heater while actually doing no such thing. If she brought it up later saying that it worked and the water was still hot, that would be the moment to point out that you changed nothing.


    ....I didn't even know you could do that to the water heater, to be honest. I've always just been in constant awe of showers that never run out of hot water. IT'S WITCHCRAFT, I TELL YOU


  12. I don't believe half the things you write about Mrs. Cranky... I think you blog with forked fingers...

  13. oh, you're a better man than i am a woman... :)

  14. When I met my cooking-for-himself future husband, he would not put food in the oven until the red light went off, because he knew it wasn't preheated enough. Of course, he had an all-utilities-paid apartment at the time.

  15. Seems to me I recall you not being very mechanically gifted or at least that was what I had heard from your family members!

  16. JERK! thanks jen c & Carolyn! mitch & bob can go 'scratch' I do check the dial!

  17. HAHaaaa ... Hi, Mrs. C... love it

  18. did you tell her the electric bill goes up along with the water heater thermostat?