Stupid Headlines 072113
It is time once again for:
STUPID
HEADLINE SUNDAY
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| I hope they stop him before he hurts himself! |
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Saudi Arabian Airlines reportedly refuses Israeli
passport holders to purchase tickets – This makes sense, Saudi airplane terrorists outnumber
Israeli by 276 – 0…those Israeli terrorists are long overdue.
Man Buys Toy Poodles, Learns They’re
Ferrets on Steroids – The huge Neanderthal forehead, tiny testicles and poor anger management
should have been a big give away.
Human-powered
helicopter beats the odds – Man succeeded in take-off, but crashed due to
a torn rotator cuff.
Amanda Bynes calls President Obama, Michelle 'ugly' – Now that I’ve Googled, “Who the F
is Amanda Bynes” I don’t think the Obamas should be too upset.
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| Thinks the Obamas are ugly? |
Danish woman runs 366 marathons in 365 days – Big deal, I ran a rat race every day for 40
years!
Able-bodied woman wants surgery to make her paraplegic – Her brain surgery to turn her into an idiot
was clearly successful.
Colorado town, concerned about surveillance, considers
drone hunting licenses – This
might become more popular than Snipe Hunting.
Waitresses in body paint prompts Texas town to change
clothing law – Waitresses filed
a complaint against the town law requiring waitresses to cover their top in
body paint.
Atheist group demands crosswalks be referred to as
“pedestrian safety zones”- Maybe
we should also refer to Easter as “more east!”
Oklahoma man arrested after woman spots him in toilet – Puts a new light on the term Peeping Tom. Man is in deep shit for being in deep shit.
10 Things
NOT to Say to a Person with Migraines – Number 1 is “DO YOU MIND IF I OPEN THE BLINDS AND LET
SOME SUNSHINE IN?”
Honda builds a 130 mph lawn
mower – Oh
great! I can hardly wait until my neighbor opens that
puppy up at 7am on a Saturday!
Billions
spent in Obama climate plan may be virtually useless, study suggests – I’m
guessing this is one expert study that will be ignored.
Former
President George HW Bush's son rescues woman boating in Maine – You
have to wonder…whose SON is he now?
______________________________
Last week fake headline was:
New
Jersey man jumps from plane without a chute and survives! - Man credits his
life with the fact the plane had not yet taken off.
And the winners who correctly
identified the fake were:
Val
said...
Okay, I'll take the
New Jersey plane-jumping survivor as fake. I hope he celebrated with a
dirty-water drink that he thought was actual alcohol.
Val is getting
harder and harder to fool, plus because she dissed NJ, please do not encourage her by visiting her
blog @
http://unbaggingthecats.blogspot.com/
she is funny, but for dissing NJ she must be punished so do not visit this site
Dan the
Mountain Man said...
I am going with the
New Jersey man jumps from the plane as the fake. But the President Obama with
the broccoli is tempting to pick. But Bush one said he did not like it so I can
see President Obama saying it.
Congratulations Dan;
people please visit Dan’s site for interesting photos, used book sales and good
old North Carolina insight @
I am pleased to
report that this week Fran (Fishducky) was finally stumped so there is no need
for me to promote her always entertaining site @ http://fishducky.blogspot.com/
"Able-bodied woman wants surgery to make her paraplegic "
ReplyDeleteAnything for that coveted handicap parking space, right?
I think the toy poodle story is fake. No self respecting ferret I know would EVER get a haircut like that.
S
'torn rotator cuff' bwahahahaha...
ReplyDeletewell, i'm gonna go with toy poodles. but the atheist group is a very close second. (at least i hope so...) sheesh! worry about something important, people! like ferrets impersonating poodles!
So many weird ones this week, it's hard to guess. Is it "Atheist group demands crosswalks be referred to as “pedestrian safety zones”"?
ReplyDeleteNot a clue.....but then I find nearly everything in the world totally baffling these days. I am still recovering from my caregiver presenting me with my newly rewritten (printed larger and blacker) personal phone book which she copied from my old one which I can no longer read. It took a few minutes of perplexity before I realized that the reason I could not find anyone was because she had rearranged all the entries alphabetically by First Name...... sigh.
ReplyDeleteI still love ya, Joe.
10 Things NOT to Say to a Person with Migraines – Number 1 is “DO YOU MIND IF I OPEN THE BLINDS AND LET SOME SUNSHINE IN?”
ReplyDeleteI pick this one, even though I have no expectation, or track record, of winning.
Well, like the human-powered helicopter's rotator cuff...I am torn. Torn between Ferrets on Steroids, and the High-Speed Honda Lawnmower.
ReplyDeleteI used to have a miniature poodle, so I know they can be rambunctious. However, around these parts, the terminology is "Ferrets on crack."
Does Honda make lawnmowers? Does Honda make ANYTHING high-speed? I don't see the market for it, unless it's designed for lawnmower racers, who I imagine to be all "Buy American."
FINAL ANSWER: I'm going with the Honda 130 mph Lawnmower as fake. I will reserve my NJ disses for later weeks.
I think I will go with the Danish woman runs 366 marathons in 365 days. That seems like a lot of running for one person.
ReplyDelete