THE CRANKY OLD MAN
Random thoughts and stuff from a cranky old man. Humor (maybe)and satire, mostly stuff from a confused head.
I intend for this blog to be non-political. If I offer a political statement, rebuttals are permitted, however this blog is not for the unsolicited political opinions of others and as such those comments will be deleted and not published.
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Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Rules for eating at the beach
Rules for eating at
I am currently down on the fabulous New Jersey Shore
for a few weeks vacation.I know, I’m
retired so vacation from what?Because I
I was perusing the internet and I could not pass
up this article from “The Daily Meal” whatever that publication is.The article was
Rules For Eating At The Beach
I will be going to the beach every day, so I
should make sure I know the rules for eating at the beach.I have been going to the shore all my
life.I have been eating at the beach
all my life; I hope I haven’t broken any eating at the beach rules.Well according to “The Daily Meal” here are
1.Do not feed the sea gulls.
Who knew?I am so glad I learned this rule.Now I know that if you feed the gulls they
will descend upon you by the hundreds and they will steal all your food and
shit on your head.Makes sense…ok I’ll
follow this rule.
Well actually I have never fed
the sea gulls on the beach even without knowing it was a rule.I have never fed them because I’m pretty sure
that if you do they will descend upon you by the hundreds and steal all your
food and shit on your head.
Don’t take ice cream in a cooler; it
probably won’t stay cold enough for very long.
This is a rule?This is not a
rule, this is common sense.Only an
idiot would pack ice cream in a cooler to take to the beach.In all my years of going to the beach I have
never heard of or seen anyone pack ice cream in a cooler.That is probably why every beach in New
Jersey has an ice cream guy hawking ice cream up and down the beach all day
long.#2 probably does not have to be a
3.Find a Good Parking Spot
Weather solo or in a group find a
spot close to the water, but away from garbage.Garbage attracts sea gulls.
Another great rule.Imagine going
to the beach and going close to the water…what a great idea, and staying away
from garbage! Terrific rule.All these
are great rules and very informative.
I am, however, surprised that there are only three rules.I think they left out some important
Just because it is a sandwich, don’t put sand on it.
Do not go swimming with a hotdog.
Don’t feed the Great White Sharks.
There, now I think all of the rules for eating at the beach are
covered.So go all you beach lovers,
enjoy eating at the beach