Friday, March 9, 2018
Can You Hear Me Now?
Sometimes I think Mrs. C is trying to get rid of me. If I forget something or can’t think of a word, she is ready to put me away. Currently she will not let go of me losing my hearing.
I am sure I do not hear as well as I once did, but I can hear just fine. She thinks I can’t hear because she doesn’t realize man’s capability of tuning out their wives.
I admit the whispering, low talk mumbling on TV shows bothers me, but I am not doing the whispering or mumbling. I can hear them if I concentrate, but I don’t enjoy a show if I have to work hard and concentrate to hear the dialog.
I thought it was me (or Mrs. C was convincing me that it was me) until I realized that in the movie theater I can hear just fine. In the theater the volume is turned up way loud, obviously so people can hear the low talk and dramatic whispering.
So, it is not me!
Some of you are thinking,
“Oh Cranky, listen to your wife, old people never realize when their hearing is going.”
I beg to differ. I have been deaf. Years ago, as a very young person I had an ear wax buildup problem that had me slowly lose my hearing. I did not realize it at first, but when you don’t hear a car honk warning, when people start to yell at you, when you answer the phone and no one is there, you are losing your hearing. Been there, not there now.
Mrs. C just keeps looking for old person signs in everything.
Yesterday we received a “free offer” from an audio doctor for an appointment.
Mrs. C was all over it.
“You need to go!”
“YOU NEED TO GO!”
“I heard you, I was just kidding. I don’t need to go, I hear just fine.”
“You don’t, you turn the TV up to 16 when 14 is just fine.”
“So, I have to see an audio doctor because I hear the TV better at two clicks above you?”
“You always turn it up before you go to sleep.”
“Because I am sleeping on my side…one ear is muffled, and if I hear a low talk mumble, it keeps me awake trying to concentrate on what they are saying.”
“So, you need the TV to be extra loud to go to sleep? That is ridiculous.”
“You eat pudding with a fork!”
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Nothing, I just want to get off the subject.”
“You should see this doctor!”
“LA LA LA LA LA…I can’t hear you.”
“I heard that!”