STUPID HEADLINES 031818
it is time again for
 |
| I hope he chose the one time payout and not a 20 year distribution |
| STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY |
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes
sophomoric comments.
___________________________________
Woman sues restaurant alleging she
was hurt by drag queen's breast – Beaten by boobs, rocked by rack, tagged by ta ta’s, mashed by
melons, bashed by bags, harmed by hooters…that’s all my thirteen-year-old-self
has got.
GAY CONVERSION THERAPIST FOUND GUILTY
OF HAVING SEX WITH HIS MALE PATIENTS TO 'CURE' THEM – It could work, I think I may have
made several women change teams in my day.
Skunks invade small New Mexico town –
Must be an election
coming soon.
MLB Prospect Cut By Team After Video
Of Him Beating Girlfriend Surfaces – He couldn’t hit her curves.
Russian plane loses load of gold,
platinum and diamonds – Accidentally dropped its cargo over Mar Largo, Florida.
Arm homeless with shotguns to reduce
crime, US Senate hopeful says – What could possibly go wrong?
New Jersey church shocked after Jesus
statue stolen 90 years ago is returned – Actually it was just borrowed.
Chicago students allegedly trash
Walmart during National School Walkout protest - “They pounced on cars in the lot, vandalized
two of the school buses parked there, threw Gatorade bottles at shoppers, smoke
bombs, and we heard gun shots in the parking lot.”
Problem solved!
Second Top Nike
Executive Departs Amid Complaints of Workplace Behavior – Apparently,
they can not “Just do it” whenever they like.
O.J. Simpson has a lot to say about
Donald Trump and Colin Kaepernick – Maybe it is me, but I’ve never been too interested in a murderer’s
opinion of anyone.
Tinder sues dating app Bumble –
Not a stupid
headline, I just want to hear the bailiff announce, “Next on the docket is the
case Tinder vs. Bumble.”
FEEL-GOOD STORY OF THE
WEEK:
Random company pays drunk’s $1500 Uber
bill as a thank you for not drinking and driving – A slow week for good news, but I do
have a soft spot in my heart for drunks.
Your opening salvo caught my attention....must have the luck of the Irish, lol.
ReplyDeleteGot a giggle about the Mar Largo bombing.
ReplyDeleteMust have been a slow news week lol.
ReplyDeleteI love the feel good story. What a nice thing to do for a drunk.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day. ☺
Not only am i not interested in what Mr. Simpson has to say about this or any other topic, i am not interested in what “famous” or “infamous” people have to say about most topics. Just because they have the limelight does not mean their opinions are more valid or important than anyone else’s.
ReplyDeleteWait. . . Drag queens got breasts?
ReplyDeleteYou missed your calling ;)
ReplyDelete"Russian plane loses load of gold, platinum and diamonds – Accidentally dropped its cargo over Mar Largo, Florida." Man, that guy has all the luck! ;)
ReplyDeleteMaybe that old lottery winner threw himself a grand party that night, and overdid it with the hookers. My thirteen-year-old self appreciates your effort on the boob-beaten woman.
ReplyDelete$1500 for a ride? Wait, was he returning that statue of Jesus to New Jersey? BTW, It only took the real Jesus 3 days to return...no Uber driver was involved.
ReplyDeleteOh gee, you made me smile with these.
ReplyDeleteWhat, no drunk horses from Florida?
ReplyDelete