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Saturday, October 6, 2018

Baby-head


Baby-head

Baby-head, that is what we used to call them.  Them being those kids where winning was all important and who would do anything to win. 

Play a friendly game of pick-up basketball, and the Baby-head argued every play.  Without baby-heads, kids self-refereed.  If you clearly double dribbled, walked or hacked another player you called it on yourself.

“Yeah, yeah, steps, my bad.”

“Sorry, my foul, I hacked you.”

Granted the walk had to be obvious and the hack was never ticky-tack, but we still called them on ourselves.

The baby-heads called them on others.  They called close infractions, ticky-tack fouls, and they argued forever.  Much of the time players just gave in to the Baby-head.  These were games that would not be reported on in the paper, these were games to twenty and then choose sides for a new game.  We tended to just let Baby-head have his way…who really cared.

In a neighborhood baseball game, on a close play, there was an unwritten rule, “Tie goes to the runner.”  With Baby-head it was never a tie.  “I beat the throw, no tie!”  Or “You were out, no tie.”

Baby-head knew all the rules and would use them and nit-pick when ever it helped him win.  Sometimes he would make up a rule, or argue the interpretation of a rule.  He did this especially in baseball where so many different variables could happen on any play.

If someone batted out of order, Baby-head would wait for the at-bat result before deciding to call the infraction or not.  If he thought someone missed a base or his foot came off the bag, Baby-head was there to argue.

Who would try the hidden baseball trick?  Baby-head. 

Who had a receiver loiter by the sideline like he wasn’t in the football game only to sprint for an undefended TD pass?  Baby-head.

Most kids didn’t pay that much attention to the score.  Baby-head did, he kept score and he had a selected memory which was always in his favor.

If you were a kid growing up playing neighborhood pick-up games, you know who Baby-head was.  Every neighborhood had a Baby-head.  The guy that threatened to leave with the only ball or bat if he didn’t get his way…that’s right, Baby-head!

I suppose eventually these Baby-heads grew up.  I wonder what became of them.


10 comments:

  1. No need to wonder what happened to them. Just give a bit of thought and see how many adults act the same way.

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  2. OK, I'll give you your desired answer: They did indeed grow up, split into teams...let's call them, oh, I dunno, Democrats and Republicans...and moved to Washington, DC, where they take turns seeing who could be the biggest baby-heads. :)

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  3. You know what happened to them, and we don't like them any better today than we did then.

    And my attitude is if baby-heads want to go home for not getting their way, let them!

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  4. No comment. Don't want to get myself into trouble or appear to be a baby-head.

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  5. I think most grown-up baby-heads spend the majority of their time attending high school sporting events.

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  6. They really can ruin a fun day can't they. I have to admit my favorite player from years ago, Mike Lowell, did the hidden ball trick,twice. At the time I was delighted but I guess it wasn't too sportsmanlike. I still like him though.

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  7. They grew up to be CEO's of big corporations, or even worse, politicians!!

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  8. The guys I played pickup games with didn't call fouls on ourselves; the general rule was 'no autopsy, no foul'. But there were one or two guys who'd call a foul whenever the amazing move they planned didn't work out like they wanted it to, whether they got touched or not. . .

    Heh. . . what Lowandslow said. . .

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