Stupid Headlines 121816
It is time again for
And bar less.
Stupid Headline
Sunday
|
This week’s stupid headlines
and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
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MLB bans hazing ritual of rookies
dressing as women – Can
they still dress as women if they want to?
Diner at Florida restaurant
reportedly asks eatery to change ‘offensive’ Christmas music – I feel the same way about Sinatra in Italian
restaurants…not
really…maybe a little.
Pastor tells kids waiting to see
Santa that he doesn't exist – That is ridiculous, the pastor was right there talking to
them, of course he exists.
Professor Bans Students from
Using Term ‘Illegal Immigrants’ on Final Exams – In four years of college, I never had the need to use the term Illegal Immigrants...why was a ban needed?
Death row inmate's lawyers say they'd
prefer firing squad over lethal injection – I’d rather have a lawyer that tried to get me free,
not negotiate how to have me killed.
Md. teen shoots a buck that stormed
into his living room and trashed a Christmas tree – Teen was behind the couch, he fired
just left of the glowing nose and got him between the eyes.
Woman Farts During Surgery, Setting
Fire To Laser In Operating Room – So that’s why they tell you not to eat anything after 11:00.
Dylann Roof trial: Will he get the
death penalty? – I
am personally against capital punishment, but I would not object if they picked
Hannibal Lecter as his cell mate.
Cuba wants to pay off $270 million
debt in rum – Throw in
a few cigars and I’m good.
Wells Fargo bleeding continues: New
account openings dive 41% - So, when they can't open an account without customer approval the number
of new account openings fall…who could have guessed?
Apple owes $2 million for not giving
workers meal breaks – If I was paid for all the lunches I ate at my desk while still working I
could retire…oh…wait.
FEEL GOOD HEADLINE OF THE WEEK
Quick-thinking 11-year-old boy helps foil girl's
kidnapping - At first he thought the man was the girl’s uncle, but quickly
noticed something was not right. TJ quickly ran to get some help before chasing
the man down.
The suspect was Raeshawn
Perez, who told police that he wanted to have sex with the young victim before
his plans were foiled by the quick-thinking 11-year-old and the neighbors who
jumped into action to take him down.
James Ware told reporters
that he and other people in the neighborhood were able to track down Perez at a
nearby vacant home. TJ was waiting for them.
“He pointed behind the house,
and said he went behind the house,” he said. “I pulled into the alley and threw
(the car) in park. My wife yelled at him and told him to put the child down. He
was about to put her in a window.”
Perez let the girl go as Ware
approached him, but took off running. Ware said he was able to catch Perez and
hold him down until police showed up.
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Come Back Next Week For More
STUPID HEADLINES!!
Firing squad would most likely be more cost efficient and give the guards a chance of relieving stress. It would probably be my choice.
ReplyDeleteWhere did the feel good news happen? If it happened here, I don't think it's too good ...
If the prisoner in question is un Utah, or the convicted person is Mormon, it makes perfectly good sense to them to ask for a firing squad. From my understanding (a friend who grew up Mormon told me), one of the Mormon teachings is that, to be forgiven for some horrendous sins, you have to shed your own blood in death. That's why a murderer was allowed to choose death by firing squad many years ago in Utah.
ReplyDeleteOffensive Christmas music? Well since it starts in Sept now by December 25th I'm pretty sick of it but definitely not offended. Now rap music is a whole different story.
ReplyDeleteThe world is a crazy place isn't it. Yes it is.
ReplyDeleteI linked you to Silly Sunday. Not for the stupid headlines, but for all your comments about said headlines.
Have a fabulous day. ☺
I don't find Christmas music offensive, but those guys ringing bells for donations drive me nuts.
ReplyDeleteThese were all great, but I do think you are kind of asking for trouble with that Sinatra comment. I would stay out of Italian restaurants for a while if I were you.
ReplyDeleteThe illegal immigrant ban works: If 10 undocumented workers get a train bound for Mexico City traveling 60 miles per hour, and 10 Mexican citizens start running north across the desert towards El Paso at 5 miles per hour at the very same moment, at what point in time will ICE officers decide to go to lunch?
ReplyDelete"Woman Farts During Surgery, Setting Fire To Laser In Operating Room" This can't be true because my wife says women don't fart.
ReplyDeleteHahaha, oh man, that HAS to be a fake headline, haha... that gave me a good laugh! - http://www.domesticgeekgirl.com
ReplyDeleteThese were real knee slappers though I will kind of miss the MLB rookies having to dress up in silly costumes once a year. They looked so cute. I thought the rookies got a kick out of it also but evidently not.
ReplyDeleteSo that woman who farted and blew up the OR....is that on YouTube? ;)
ReplyDeleteSo that's why they wear masks in the OR.
ReplyDeleteNow that I'm dealing with getting new knees in the early part of 2017, I'm scared to eat any food for 3 days before surgery. Or else take a bottle of Beano the night! Lol
ReplyDeleteI learn so much when I visit you.
ReplyDeleteThat fart-ignition thing must happen all the time in the OR. I bet they have fire extinguishers for that very purpose. And seriously, we should absolutely take the rum from CUba; that's a genius idea. Next year I'm sending brownies to the IRS instead of a check.
That whole Dylann Roof story hits close to home - when we lived in South Carolina, we lived in Lexington, where Roof lived and at one time also went to high school. Luckily, it wasn't the same high school that our son went to.
ReplyDeleteI had the same idea about the illegal immigrant headline as Nasreen did; she beat me to the punch.
Yo ho ho and $270 million in rum! Take that payment!
ReplyDelete