Headlines 9-25
It’s Sunday, time for my weekly post of last week’s strange headlines with my stupid sophomoric comments. This post has not proven to be particularly popular, but it is simple. Without further ado-
THIS WEEKS HEADLINES AND MY SOPHMORIC COMMENTS:
Republicans criticize tax on millionaires idea – Taxing an idea is ridiculous no matter how rich a person is!
France say 'non!' to easy ride against All Blacks – Entire country demands those of African descent not allowed shock absorbers.
Maryland Man Who Faked Death Gets 7 Years in Prison – Lawyer demands retrial on grounds fake death penalty is against fake constitution.
Scientists Worry over 'Bizarre' Trial for Failing to Predict Earthquake – Today’s weather report, temps from 65 – 80, cloudy with a chance of a violent cataclysmic earthquake.
Man Reportedly Impersonating NFL Quarterback Vince Young – Eagle fans complain Vince Young is impersonating an NFL Quarterback.
PETA plans porn website to promote message – Degrading women is OK, just don’t tease a puppy!
Kindergartener brings crack pipe, meth for show-and-tell – Damn, I thought finger painting was cool.
U.S. calls online poker site a "global Ponzi scheme" - If you can’t trust a poker player, who can you trust?
Man wins dumpling eating contest, then dies – He always wanted to retire on top.
Couple from '16 and Pregnant' arrested in Arkansas – Couple is released and marriage deemed valid after proving they are in fact first cousins.
Texas School Punishes Boy for Opposing Homosexuality - Punishment was rescinded after boy repented and gave the principal a blow job.
Texas Prisons End Special Last Meals for Inmates – No more last meal requests before they KILL you. Isn’t that cruel and unusual punishment? I’d think twice before I kill anyone in Texas.
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