NEW AND IMPROVED

This blog is now sugar FREE, fat FREE, gluten FREE, all ORGANIC and all NATURAL!!

Saturday, September 17, 2016

STUPID HEADLINE 091816

STUPID HEADLINE 091816
It is time again for
Stupid Headline Sunday
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments. 
                                                  _________________________
Woman hit, knocked to ground by catfish that fell from the sky – I cannot wait for “Catfishnado,” coming soon on the SciFi channel.
Woman kissed by sailor in famed photo at World War Two's end dies – Authorities are warning anyone who has been kissed by this sailor to seek immediate medical attention.

The real reason women seem to always go for jerks – I had to hide this article from Mrs. Cranky.

Playboy sees sales soar despite no nudity in magazines – No nudes is good news.  (OK, I took that from the article.)

California gov preserves 'tampon' tax – Ooooh!  I’m a guy, but I can only imagine how painful that would be!  What? tax, not tacks…never mind.

Zimbabwe will print its own version of the U.S. dollar – Is this the country?  I went to school with a Vito Zimbabwe and he was always getting into trouble.

Diego the giant tortoise saves his species – Protect those eggs Diego…Swiper no swipey.  You did it!*

 

Guggenheim's 18 karat golden toilet opens today, and you can actually use it – I got nothing today, but I guarantee this will be the subject of a  stupid headline story in the near future.

NYC judge dismisses case in fatal beating of wife's attacker – Prosecutors have dropped charges against a New Yorker who used a tire iron on a fleeing, cocaine-fueled intruder who had tried to rape his wife.” This is why I love NY!

 

Unilever looks to buy Jessica Alba's Honest Company – Her crooked company is not for sale.

Pastor allegedly shoots, kills minister during argument over Bible at retirement home – Pretty sure that’s like number 6 on the “Thou shalt not’s!”

Mathmetician solves puzzle of parking lots – I don’t see what is so complicated, but maybe he could figure out how to make people to stop leaving their carts in parking spaces.

 

*Dora the explorer all you old people.

_______________________________

Come back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINES

16 comments:

  1. So will i be flush with excitement when you come out with your comment on the golden toilet? Heeheehee! Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I looked.
    There is no thall shalt not shoot the minister.

    ReplyDelete
  3. laughed at the 'hide from mrs. cranky' line.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It doesn't say who won the argument between the pastor and the minister.

    ReplyDelete
  5. We saw the 'golden toilet' on the news last night. Must have been a slow news day.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Tampon tax? Really. I live in California and it's run by some pretty special idiots.

    I linked you to Silly Sunday.

    Have a fabulous day Joe. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  7. The big headline of today is: Ron Burgundy still in the race for White House 2016. Burgundy says voters are "Adorable".

    ReplyDelete
  8. Let me get this right---I can stop looking for nudies in Playboy? Time to cancel my subscription.

    ReplyDelete
  9. hahahaha! I don't know which of thees is the funniest. Surely Mrs. Cranky laughs all the time around you!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Your stupid headlines post is ALWAYS my favorite!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. You don't suppose Mrs. Cranky wrote the article? I read about Diego. He is quite the stud and ancient to boot.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Never mind stupid headlines. I like the smiley faces.

    ReplyDelete
  13. “Prosecutors have dropped charges against a New Yorker who used a tire iron on a fleeing, cocaine-fueled intruder who had tried to rape his wife.”

    Tire iron? Here in Texas our dilemma would be which caliber to use. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Couldn't the Guggenheim get by with a Ferguson? Al Bundy swore by it!

    ReplyDelete
  15. What I'd like to know is if the woman took the catfish home for dinner!

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, especially some of my commenters are funny as heck!

Oh, and don't be shy, Never miss a Cranky Post.

Sign up for an email of every post...over there...on your right...go on!