STUPID HEADLINE 091816
It is time again for
Stupid Headline Sunday
This week’s stupid headlines
and my stupider, sometimes sophomoric comments.
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Woman hit, knocked to ground by catfish
that fell from the sky – I cannot wait for
“Catfishnado,” coming soon on the SciFi channel.
Woman kissed by sailor in famed photo
at World War Two's end dies – Authorities are warning anyone who has been kissed by this
sailor to seek immediate medical attention.
The real reason women
seem to always go for jerks – I had to hide this article from Mrs. Cranky.
Playboy sees sales soar
despite no nudity in magazines – No nudes is good news. (OK, I took that from the article.)
California gov
preserves 'tampon' tax – Ooooh! I’m a guy, but I can only imagine how painful
that would be! What? tax, not
tacks…never mind.
Zimbabwe will print its own version
of the U.S. dollar – Is
this the country? I went to school with
a Vito Zimbabwe and he was always getting into trouble.
Diego the giant
tortoise saves his species – Protect those eggs Diego…Swiper no swipey. You did it!*
Guggenheim's 18 karat
golden toilet opens today, and you can actually use it – I got nothing today,
but I guarantee this will be the subject of a stupid headline story in the near future.
NYC judge dismisses
case in fatal beating of wife's attacker – “Prosecutors have dropped charges
against a New Yorker who used a tire iron on a fleeing, cocaine-fueled intruder
who had tried to rape his wife.” This is why I love NY!
Unilever looks to buy Jessica Alba's
Honest Company – Her
crooked company is not for sale.
Pastor allegedly
shoots, kills minister during argument over Bible at retirement home – Pretty sure that’s
like number 6 on the “Thou shalt not’s!”
Mathmetician solves puzzle of parking lots – I don’t see what is
so complicated, but maybe he could figure out how to make people to stop
leaving their carts in parking spaces.
*Dora the
explorer all you old people.
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Come back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINES
So will i be flush with excitement when you come out with your comment on the golden toilet? Heeheehee! Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!
ReplyDeleteI looked.
ReplyDeleteThere is no thall shalt not shoot the minister.
laughed at the 'hide from mrs. cranky' line.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't say who won the argument between the pastor and the minister.
ReplyDeleteWe saw the 'golden toilet' on the news last night. Must have been a slow news day.
ReplyDeleteTampon tax? Really. I live in California and it's run by some pretty special idiots.
ReplyDeleteI linked you to Silly Sunday.
Have a fabulous day Joe. ☺
The big headline of today is: Ron Burgundy still in the race for White House 2016. Burgundy says voters are "Adorable".
ReplyDeleteLet me get this right---I can stop looking for nudies in Playboy? Time to cancel my subscription.
ReplyDeleteThat smiley face is not pretty.
ReplyDeletehahahaha! I don't know which of thees is the funniest. Surely Mrs. Cranky laughs all the time around you!
ReplyDeleteYour stupid headlines post is ALWAYS my favorite!!
ReplyDeleteYou don't suppose Mrs. Cranky wrote the article? I read about Diego. He is quite the stud and ancient to boot.
ReplyDeleteNever mind stupid headlines. I like the smiley faces.
ReplyDelete“Prosecutors have dropped charges against a New Yorker who used a tire iron on a fleeing, cocaine-fueled intruder who had tried to rape his wife.”
ReplyDeleteTire iron? Here in Texas our dilemma would be which caliber to use. ;)
Couldn't the Guggenheim get by with a Ferguson? Al Bundy swore by it!
ReplyDeleteWhat I'd like to know is if the woman took the catfish home for dinner!
ReplyDelete