STUPID HEADLINES 011914
It is time once again for:
|Except for the race and gender thing it was a perfect match|
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.
One headline is completely made up. Guess the fake and win a mention.
Scientists discover hormone that blocks pot "high" – Why in the Hell would anyone even look for such a horrible hormone?
India makes first gun designed for women – So if you are in India and you’re pissed off at your wife, the local store will recommend this special gun?
Government spent millions on penis pumps, paid double retail price – This explains all the really big dicks in government, but do they have to screw us on price as well?
Convicted Oregon pimp sues Nike over lack of shoe warning label – Apparently under certain conditions these shoes will cause you to abuse women and turn them into prostitutes…I think a label would be appropriate.
Denver police shoot suspect who used woman as human shield – Turns out some women do not stop bullets very well.
Thief tries to steal Sigmund Freud's ashes – I blame the thief’s mother.
Congress to vote on a cut in pay for themselves and their staff - Vote will take place on April 1.
California woman finds illegal distillery inside her garage – "Officer, I swear, the last time I looked it was a ‘57 Chevy!"
Little League baseball coach sues former player over victory celebration injury – I think our tort’s law needs a “Shit happens clause.”
Canada's Olympic Skeleton Team Shows Off Amazing Helmets – Helmets smelmets, in what kind of event do skeletons compete?
Court affirms Mass. murderer's right to get sex change in prison – Do they have to disinfect the chainsaw?
School bus driver suspended after bus drags girl for block – I’m pretty sure the first rule of bus driving is let the passengers off before closing the door.
Last week’s fake headline was:
12 year old weight lifter tests positive for human growth hormone – Well yeah, he’s 12!
The only winner was the usually gullible Chubby Chatterbox!
Stephen Hayes said...
The twelve year old weight lifter doesn't sound real to me.
Congratulations Stephan! Visit Stephan @ http://thechubbychatterbox.blogspot.com for stories, art lessons and lots of really good stuff…just check it out!!
Come back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY