STUPID HEADLINES 011914
It is time once again for:
 |
| Except for the race and gender thing it was a perfect match |
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
This week’s stupid
headlines and my stupider sophomoric and sometimes offensive comments.
One headline is completely made up. Guess the fake and win
a mention.
___________________________
Scientists discover hormone that blocks pot "high" – Why in the Hell would anyone even look for such a horrible hormone?
India makes first gun designed for women – So if you
are in India and you’re pissed off at your wife, the local store will recommend
this special gun?
Government spent
millions on penis pumps, paid double retail price – This explains all the
really big dicks in government, but do they have to screw us on price as well?
Convicted Oregon pimp sues Nike over lack of shoe warning label – Apparently under certain conditions these shoes will cause you to abuse
women and turn them into prostitutes…I think a label would be appropriate.
Denver police shoot suspect who used woman as human shield – Turns out some women do not stop bullets very well.
Thief tries to steal Sigmund Freud's ashes – I blame
the thief’s mother.
Congress to vote on a cut in pay for themselves and their staff - Vote will take place on April 1.
California woman finds illegal distillery inside her garage – "Officer, I swear, the last time I looked it was a ‘57 Chevy!"
Little League baseball coach sues former player over victory celebration
injury – I think our tort’s law needs a “Shit happens clause.”
Canada's Olympic Skeleton Team Shows
Off Amazing Helmets – Helmets smelmets, in what kind of event do skeletons compete?
Court affirms Mass. murderer's right to get sex change in prison – Do they have to disinfect the chainsaw?
School bus driver suspended after bus drags girl for block – I’m pretty sure the first rule of bus driving is let the passengers off
before closing the door.
___________________________________
Last week’s fake headline was:
12 year old
weight lifter tests positive for human growth hormone – Well
yeah, he’s 12!
The only winner was the usually gullible
Chubby Chatterbox!
Stephen Hayes
said...
The twelve year old
weight lifter doesn't sound real to me.
Congratulations Stephan! Visit Stephan @ http://thechubbychatterbox.blogspot.com
for stories, art lessons and lots of really good stuff…just check it out!!
Come back next week for more
STUPID HEADLINE SUNDAY
Congress voting themselves a pay cut? Not even on April Fools day.
ReplyDeleteyay for steven!
ReplyDeletei'm going for congress voting on april fools' day.
Yep, these are common anymore aren't they. You just can't fix stupid.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day. ☺
Is that congressional cut in pay like a double negative?
ReplyDeleteIf not, it's the one.
I wish it were the headline about penis pumps, but I think it's the one about congressional pay.
ReplyDeleteoh my gosh these were all so funny - but the fake HAS to be Congress voting themselves a pay cut. I seriously doubt they would even consider that for half a second.
ReplyDeleteoh my gosh these were all so funny - but the fake HAS to be Congress voting themselves a pay cut. I seriously doubt they would even consider that for half a second.
ReplyDeleteThis is too easy this week! Are you sure you had your coffee this morning?
ReplyDeleteOF COURSE, it has to be the one about congress voting for their pay cut!
I am going with the congress vote. Next you tell me them going to cut taxes to 1 percent.
ReplyDeleteOne of these days you're gonna fool us and all of them are going to be fake. Until then, I doubt Congress would ever vote to cut its pay.
ReplyDeleteSomehow the dicks in Washington have pay raises figured out and yet tax cuts seem to be such a mystery--even on April 1.
ReplyDeleteCongress has gotta be the joke. I mean the fake.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed your comments but the Freud's ashes one cracked me up.
ReplyDeleteI'm going with the crowd mentality. It has to be the congress one.