CONTACT
One of my first posts, from May 2011
I recently attended a séance with a local medium. I was skeptical at the start, but it must have been real, no one could have made this stuff up. This medium specialized in contacting famous people. She talked to several icons, here is a how it went:
“George Washington, is that you George?”
“Yes it’s me, would I lie?”
“George, why did you chop down that tree?”
“Actually my old man did it, Mom was pissed. He gave me a buck and I took the rap for him.”
“What? So you lied?”
“Whatever.”
“Hey, it’s Steve Irwin. He’s mumbling, I’m not sure what he is saying, what’s that Steve, speak up.”
“A sting ray? Crikey, a fucking sting ray?” (Damn, I loved Steve Irwin!)
“FDR, FDR over here. Any words for the living?”
“Yes! What took Jonas so freaking long?” (I have no idea what this meant, I must have thought it was funny in 2011.)
“Wow, I have Abe Lincoln, any questions for the Abe?”
“Ask him did he have any regrets.”
“Abe, any regrets?”
“Yes, I think I should have just said 87 years. That and, I should have skipped the show.”
“Hey, Marco Polo, is it you?”
“Yes it’s me. Damn I explored Asia for 24 years, practically invented the modern map, and what am I famous for? That annoying flipping kids swimming pool game!”
“Wait, I think JFK is here. Mr. President is there anything the USA could have done for you?”
“Don’t ask!”
“Oh my Lord, it’s Jesus Christ! Jesus, Jesus, are you planning a comeback?”
“Yes, and this time things will be different. Warn everyone, when I come back don’t cross me!”
Corny stuff huh? Sounds like those old rock and roll parodies they did in the fifties.
Ha ha. Now that would have been an entertaining psychic. I'd have gone back for more:)
ReplyDeleteWell done. I laughed out loud on some of these.
ReplyDeleteI linked this post to Happy Tuesday.
Have a fabulous day, Joe. 😎
Ha! Very funny! I went to a psychic many years ago when I was pregnant with my first kiddo. She was the entertainment at a Tupperware party of all things. Anyway, she told me I was having a girl. I had a boy, my sister had the girl. She told me to watch out because something was going to happen with the rear end my car. My sister's car got hit from behind and she ended up in the hospital. She said I would live in a ranch style house. My sister's first house was a ranch. She did tell me a few other things that came true but none of it pertained to me personally. I'm not sure if I was glad about that or not! My sister, however, was a bit freaked out!
ReplyDeleteI love Joe, he's a corny old coot--but yaya, this gave me a good chuckle! :)
DeleteYou do have quite the imagination!
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh! Marco Polo and Abe Lincoln made me snort.
ReplyDeleteI always wonder about psychics. Its like why don't they predict more of things that will happen, like say perhaps Covid-19? Or stocks that will do good? Or perhaps there's a code of ethics that they don't do those things?
ReplyDeletebetty
Brilliant! Absolutely.
ReplyDeleteThe local medium I visited was not a medium at all. She was extra large.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
Hahahahahaha
DeleteI'm grinning.
ReplyDeletehahaha
ReplyDeletethat was reliving lol
Too many documentaries on Houdini have made me extremely skeptical of séances. I do love that show Dead Files tho. I think Amy Allen is the real deal. :) - Loved this post.
ReplyDelete