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Thursday, May 30, 2019

GEEK SQUAD


GEEK SQUAD
Have you ever taken your computer to the Geek Squad or some similar group of computer wizards to fix a problem? 

These people are pretty good, but not nearly as good as they lead you to believe.  You think they are complete experts, computer geniuses, those who know all about the mysteries of these frustrating machines.

Truth is, almost no one knows everything about computers.  Just as your general practitioner knows a lot about all medicine, he often has to send you to a specialist, and just as a specialist knows everything about his specialty, he is not as good as the general practitioner for everything else.

The problem is, these Geek Squad guys don’t tell you they are just computer GP’s.  Often, they are not even good GP’s.  Many know how to change passwords, move files, download porn and change fonts, but real problems they fake.

When I bring in my computer with a problem, they grab the mouse and start clicking.  Oh, they can click like a mother-trucker.  They click so fast you think they must really know what they are doing.  I only recently realized all that clicking is just guessing, and they guess really fast.  They try this…no, so they try that…no, so they try something else. 

After about 20 guesses, they look at you and tell you that your FRUMPTY FRAZZLE is Fizzled.  You will need to send the computer away for a while and it might be fixed.  Fifty bucks to try, probably $200 if they fix it.

You will agree, because this pimply faced kid is obviously sooo smart.

Well, some may be, some not.  None will admit,

“Like I don’t really know, I tried all the stuff that works when I play ‘Mind Shaft vs. The Moron People’, but I’m really not very good at lot of computer, you know…like…stuff.”

Last year, I came yea-close to sending my computer to the smart geeks behind the screen (Pay no attention to the geek behind the screen) when a smarter geek overheard my dope to geek conversation. 

I had mentioned that the problem came about right after a mandatory Microsoft update.  My geek assured me that that had nothing to do with my problem.  The eves-dropping geek stepped in and tried something…click, click, problem fixed.

“Oh, that mandatory Microsoft update!”

Moral of this long-winded story is, always get a second or even third geek opinion.  They are not as smart as they lead you to believe. 

Many of them used to eat library paste.   

21 comments:

  1. Many of them probably moonlight as lifeguards to keep old people out of the deep end of the condo swimming pool...

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  2. I have my own equivalent of the Geek Squad when I have to call support for the company I work for if there is a computer glitz. We have to call India because that's where our IT support is. I pray I get someone that can speak English reasonably well. They eventually fix the problem and I get paid for the downtime but its always a lesson in patience. I had one guy years ago say to me when he asked me to do something (remember we are working remotely and he's trying to access my computer remotely for him to see what's wrong) that I wasn't listening to him when he gave me the "commands" needed so he could take control of my computer and work on it. I was listening to him, I just couldn't understand him. I miss the days when IT support was all centered in the Good old USA.

    betty

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    Replies
    1. Or in whatever other country a person might live in.

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  3. There are times when I love my computer, and there are times when I wish it had never been invented.

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  4. Have you tried switching the computer off and on again? Or hitting it hard on the side? Doesn't often work for me but a geek told me it helps relieve tension. I tried it with my foot when the car did not work. I now have a dent on the door which will cost a fortune to fix. And a broken toe.

    God bless.

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  5. And they say eaves-dropping is a crime! Still, if I ever find out my FRUMPTY FRAZZLE is FIZZLED, I'll take my computer to my computer-whiz daughter. Her fee is a bottle of diet coke.

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  6. Being a home based business our geeks abc came to our home office to do the repair. The guy was eating drugs like pez. He was odd as hell and he was doing things I kept saying, Please don't touch that, that is not the issue. Then I see him take another pill. I finally said, "Are you okay, would you like to come another time when you are feeling better." He said I am never feeling better I had back surgery. I am taking percocets. Great so I have a guy high on opiods and eating them like candy and he wants to now take my computer back to the office. No! I thank him and tell him I am not comfortable with that idea. He was there another hour and when he stood up he had to get his balance. You could see he was flying. I've had 4 back surgeries in my life. I was not needing percocets around the clock. While I know everyone is different this guy had no right to be employed, he needed to be in rehab! I have microsoft and I called them when after an update it wasn't working propertly. It took 2 minutes and bam it was all working. You may wish to try that next time, it's free.

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  7. Yep, all geeks aren't created equal. Just like doctors. SOMEBODY has to be last in their class... Luckily, my hubby is very computer-savvy, so he can fix most issues that pop up.

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  8. I had to take my son's laptop to the Geek Squad for a huge line that was running across his screen. They seemed to know exactly what the issue was, but still had to send it away to be repaired, so I guess they really didn't know that much!

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  9. I've never taken my computer to these folks. We have a computer guy that we buy our computers from. He builds them to suit your needs. He really knows about computers. He's never let us down. The geek guys I don't trust.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend. ♪♫♪♫

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  10. There's a guy right down the street who works on my computer. Just an older dude who really likes that techie stuff. Hes good about taking my hammer away from me.

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  11. If my kid can't fix it - which hasn't happened yet - I have a backup much like Sandee. The Geek Squad is a rip off.

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  12. This will jinx it, but I've had great success with the Geek Squad. Of course they are all 12 and Best Buy has to be violating child labor laws. Darn Russians!

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  13. So far, my computer fixers have been great but then they were grown men with solid businesses. Cracked up at the paste eaters.

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  14. The worst thing is when it costs multiple hundreds to fix it you find you can just buy a new computer. Then you have to start all over.

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  15. My brother in law certainly has his faults but he does in fact know computers and has never been stumped by any of my problems with various computers so lucky me cause I tend to have many computer problems.

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  16. I've never understood the eating paste thing. Why???

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  17. Mostly i just take it to one place, where the guy is a part time firefighter and can fix just about anything. It's nice when you can find someone like that.

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  18. I wouldn't trust these geek guys at all! There's a computer genius with a little shop just up the street from me who seemingly knows everything and has saved both of my laptops and all their data in recent years. And, for a reasonable price. Guys like that are gold!

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  19. this is hilarious post dear Joe as your way of writing makes even serious stuff too interesting and reminds me many great writers who wrote AMAZING humor (native language) and i was lucky to read them

    i totally agree that their clicks are all about guessing and they are expert in clicking except all other things

    last month we too took the laptop of my younger son
    both problems were external though but they charged 5000 rupees (almost 600 dollars) later my eldest son told they charged more than actual expense

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  20. Our IT guy at work openly admitted to me that he just goes to Google with most problems.

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